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Undergroundsupplements Newsletter Issue #8
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Undergroundsupplements Newsletter Issue #8 - 02-10-2012, 11:20 PM

A letter from the Tazmanian Devil

Hello again. Some of you may know, this was a pisser of a month for me. I think most of you viewed the battle between me and someone I accused of being "hot". Not only did I have to battle him, but his loyal Anabolex members made problems for me too. They filled up threads with their infantile, moronic behavior. What bothered me the most was the attacks and I didnt seem to get people backing me until most of the shit died down. Im not ungrateful, I thank each and everyone of you who believed in me and believe what I said.

Lets go on with what I said. This will be the third time that I admit that my wording was over-exaggerated at first. I claimed that the gentleman "was working with the Feds". That was wrong for me to say! I apologized, and I will not apologize again. What I should have said is that the person was "being watched", "hot", a "puppet" etc. I know this to be true and I will not back down from that accusation. I received my info from a person that knows the cat and mouse game that the Feds play. He was taught the procedures. He has the advantage of sticking his nose into the affairs and he cannot be touched! This person had names, addresses, phone numbers etc. I was hearing rumors about the person I told you about for 3 months! I didnt say anything right away. I had to be sure. When I hooked up with my source, that sealed it, we talked and we though it would be a good idea to post a warning on the board. This was not a rash and hastily made decision. A big "Fuck you" to those who said it was.

I also learned a lot from some of the posts. The real ones I found laughable were the ones that said, " lets sit and watch and after a few weeks, if nothing happens, then Tazzy will owe ****** an apology!" A few weeks??? Are you for fucking real??? You obviously do not know how the game is played. Do you really think that the feds will go and bust someone who bought 5 - 6 grand worth of anabolics right away? They know that the guy they are watching is selling it out to tons of other people who are using for themselves, but some may be sources! But in the long run, they are looking for his supplier. This operation can take up to 5 years! During that time, Big Brother is just sitting and watching and taking notes. We all here on the boards, the internet are just guppies. But remember, in fishing, you use the guppies for bait to catch the big fish. That is how they operate.

It is time for me to lay low for awhile. Im not giving up what I do, Im still out there to help people, Im still out there watching the posts and trying to shut down the scammers, and I will still do this newsletter. After the recent events on the boards, I now feel that the newsletter has to reach out into newer directions. I will keep the articles about the gear, supplements, training and the happenings in the sport of bodybuilding. But the new features that I will put in the article will be for the people that are in the game. Yes, I believe that it is your God given right to better yourself, and to change ones appearance by using anabolic steroids. But the ignorance and the greed of our controlling government makes it illegal to carry out our God given rights. So with that in mind you must learn how Big Brother operates and how you can protect yourself. Some of the posts that I saw on the boards by most of you, tells me that most of us have a lot to learn. So read the new sections, for they are important to you.

Now on to other subjects....

In Late July most of you will remember a post that will gave an email address for those who want to ask a question and have it answered publically in the Vae Victus. The reason for this is many of you may ask the same question, and if they see the answer on the Vae Victus, it will help them. So please send your questions to me at:

[email protected]********.com

You can ask any type of question you want, and if you choose to we can have your email name ommitted. I will have 3-4 different people taking turns monthly to research and to answer you in a clear concise manner. You may also send you comments/compliments too. If you send comments, please do it in a professional manner. Check it out!

Also, in late July, I created a post asking your help in sending me your experiences with cycles of roids that you have used. I asked for the roids used, how much was lost/gained and a strength pattern. I thank you for your many responses. Look below for section called the Steroid Stacking Guide. I hope this helps you upon picking a stack that will help you obtain your goals. A lot of hard work was put into this section, hope it really helps you out.

In the future.....

I plan to write a book about Anabolic Steroids. It will be my version of the WAR. But this book will try and center on all the types of steroids that are being offered out in the black market at this time. Lets face it, the WAR is the best source that covers all the different types of steroids that are offered from the black market. It gives you the brand names of the steroids that are offered from different countries. It is pretty much complete. The three big flaws with it is that the WAR is 2 and a half years old; the market and the products have changed, and the pictures are in black and white. The book "Physical Enhancement with an Edge" is a great book. It is full of fantastic and up to date information such as prices, dosages and best yet, it has color pictures of what the different Mexican anabolics look like. The flaws with the PEWAE is that it only covers steroids that are available in Mexico. And in that line, it doesnt cover all the roids that are available in Mexico. The "Underground Steroid Handbook" written by the guru, Dan Duchaine. Has great information on a lot of different steroids, stacking, HGH, and a great chapter called "Needle Arcana". But again, it is outdated, it contains no pictures.

So, my plan is to use the best features from all 3 of these books and create my own. I hopefully will be able to offer this book for sale within a half a year. I have already started. I have the funding, and help. Most of you have offered the use of your epuiptment; I thank you, and will be taking some of you up on your offers. This book will be for sale.

If you need me, you can put down a thread on the Underground asking me to email you. Remember I wont post but I will observe from time to time. I will see your message and will email you as soon as possible.

Thanks for all your kind support.

Your friend,

Tazzy


Disclaimer

NOTICE: No liability is assumed by Underground Supplements or the authors for any information contained herein. This text does not contain medical advise. Specific medical advise shoud be obtained from a licensed health practitioner. Neither Underground Supplements nor the authors advocate, promote or encourage the use of anabolic steroids or other illegal drugs. The information contained in this publication is not intended to induce or persuade anyone to use or possess anabolic steroids or any other illegal drugs Any references made directly about the effects of anabolic steroids, about obtaining anabolic steroids are for information purposes only and are expressions of the authors opinions. This publication is an attempt for a practical source of information, rather than scientific.


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Section I --Tricks, Tips for getting the "gear" thru the U.S. Customs.
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Section I --Tricks, Tips for getting the "gear" thru the U.S. Customs. - 02-10-2012, 11:20 PM

Part 1

Hint to Sources: Blue and Yellow make Green!


This is to the sources, anyone that is willing to ship the gear through the mail, UPS, DHL, Federal Express. When you ship amps, vials and tablets to your customer, it is in yours and your customers best interest to protect the contents of the package. You need to do this for a number of reasons. The number one reason is because you never know how the package will be handled. Anyone remember the beginning of the movie, "Ace Ventura - Pet Detective"? Now I know that the mail carriers or parcel companies will not handle a package that roughly. But a package does get bounced, jounced, and mishandled sometimes. And if that happens and an amp or a vial breaks open, you can bet it will get the attention of the carrier when he/she sees an amber colored oil leaking from a package. That will arise suspicion and thus they usually will open up the package. Then you can bet it will raise a few eyebrows, the next step is to call the authorities. But if you are a smart source, you have put a fake return address, or no address at all. That leaves your customer to face the music alone. He/she will not receive their goods, will have sent money for nothing. The worse thing is now he/she may have the feds knocking on their door. So please take the extra time to cushion the contents, especially the glass amps and vials. Tablets should be considered because no customer wants to buy a hundred Anadrol tabs at $3.00 a piece to have them arrive at the door and 10 of them are crumbled or broken. To protect amps or vials, the best way to protect them is to roll them up in bubble wrap. It is inexpensive and will keep the glass from breaking. Loose tablets should be put in a small container and stuffed with cotton. Wadded up newspaper, Styrofoam "peanuts", cotton are all handy cheap ways to pack a box to protect your customers amp/vials. But here is the kicker. Do not put loose amps or vials in the box, even if you have the best packing material in the world. The final and important step is to go out to your local supermarket, and pick up some "Gladlock Zipper Sandwich Bags" or the bigger "Freezer size" bags. Put any loose amps or vials in the bags and seal them. (Blue and Yellow make green!) Take the extra step in securing the openings of the bags with scotch tape. If an amp or vial breaks, then the contents will spill within the Gladlock bag and will not leak and give the contents of the package away to the enemy. I have seen instances where the amp broke in the Gladlock bag, and the person was able to draw up the liquid in a syringe and save most of the dose! To each his own. Believe me, your customers will appreciate the extra time you spend on securing their goods. And if they see you being careful, most of the time they will come back to give you more business. Also they will tell their trusted friends. So carefulness can pay off.

I felt the need to put this in, because I receive alot of letters from Underground members complaining that they received their package but one or 2 amps were busted. I also have facts that people were busted and shut down due to the amps or vials breaking and leaking out of the package. So remember sources, you are responsible for the gear until your customer faxes, emails, or calls you and tells you everything arrived in fine condition.


Part 2

Hints for Recieving the Package


I put this section back in this issue, due to the fact that we have a lot more members who are new to the game of "mail order gear" on the Underground. This may be redundant to most of you, but this is for the newest members that need to have this knowledge.

If you are new to the game of obtaining gear through the mail, please pay very close attention to this section. This knowledge will keep you from getting in unneeded trouble. If you ever have any questions, remember, the dumbest questions pertaining to this subject are the UNASKED ones!


NEVER sign for or acknowledge ordering a package. (example), If a postman will not deliver without a receiving signature, write it off as a loss and change your source. This is the most important rule! If the "postman" tries to give you a package and have you sign for it, tell him/her that you were'nt expecting anything from (wherever/whomever) and the name on the package doesn't even live here. If they persist, you can bet your ass something is up! Tell them to go away and close the door on them. Do not buy into any story that they serve you. Even if your Postman is familiar, do not trust them.

This should go without stating, if you are being followed to your P.O Box (by someone you suspect as law enforcement) abort the pickup. If you've picked up the package already and notice that you are being tailed, go to the nearest mailbox and dump the package. When picking up the package, keep an eye out. Don't be too paranoid. But, if something doesnt seem right to you, don't pick up the package.

When you know that the package has been delivered to your mailbox of your home, take it inside, and have a magic marker handy. As soon as the package is in your home, IMMEDIATELY write across the face of the package in clear legible script:

RETURN - NOT AT THIS ADDRESS or RETURN TO SENDER. Leave it in an area that is close to the front door to make it look like you were going to drop it back in the mailbox as a rejected item on your very next trip outside. If you are being watched, and they approach you, they have nothing on you as you were just about to toss it back in the mailbox as a rejected item. If no one approaches you, you should be O.K. But, just to make sure, don't open the package for a day or two, if the law is staking you out, they will make their move within 24 hours. You can be sure that they won't wait more than a few days after you receive the package to try and bust you. After a two to three days, you should be cool.

Author's note: The above hint is based on the EliteFitness "Secrets of Mail Order Steroid Success". I want to make sure I give credit where credit is due. The above is free advise. You don't have to listen to it. You may not agree with it. But the ideas and thoughts come from customers that have been using these methods without failure for years.


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Section II -- "JUICE NEWS"
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Section II -- "JUICE NEWS" - 02-10-2012, 11:20 PM

Part 1

Types of Cycles

A lot of email coming my way is from bodybuilders just jumping on the gear wagon. Most of the time they have the gear, they want to know how much and when to dose. This section may clear the air for most of you in defining the most popular types of cycles. So what you should do is to pick the best that may work for you. Remember, everyone is different. One cycle may do wonders for one bodybuildet and at the same time may be ineffective for another. If you plan on using steroids, then you must plan on your cycles according to your season. As with training, there is both an off-season steroid cycle and a pre-competition cycle. If you are not into competition, then the cycle is known as the "cutting cycles". If you are into competitions, then you must tailor your cycle in a manner that will enable you to pass drug tests at competitions where steroid use is banned. Here is a number of steroid cycles.

Straight Arrow Pattern

The "straight-arrow" pattern consists of a steroid stack in which the doses taken by the bodybuilder remain constant for each drug during the cycle. The addition of drugs after the start of the cycle does not change this designation, provided the drug added is taken at a constant dosage during the cycle. An example of this cycle using the following, Equipoise, Anavar, Primobolan Acetate. (this is a good example of a cutting cycle)

5 week cycle:

Equipoise 100mg/week

Anavar 7.5mg/100lbs/day

Primobolan tabs 100mg/day

Cliff-Hanger Pattern

The "cliff-hanger" pattern involves an overall increase in dosage during the cycle. This pattern would only be used during the off-season, as a bodybuilder would not pass a drug test with such a high concentration of steroids in his/her system. The big disadvantage of this pattern is that the bodys hormonal system is not given the chance to normalize at the end of a cycle. As a result, the chances are higher that the bodybuilder will experience problems with low libido, impotence, and a general lack of motivation. However if the bodybuilder experiences the symptoms, keep in mind that the symptoms are transitory and will disappear once the body's own hormonal system kicks in, or the bodybuilder starts another cycle. This is one of the least popular cycles, but for some it is ideal.

10 week cycle:

Weeks 1-10

Anavar 12.5mg/day

Weeks 4-8

Winstrol 100mg/week

Weeks 8-10

Winstrol 200mg/week

Week 11

All drugs stopped

Ski-Slope Pattern

The "ski-slope" pattern of steroid use can be described as a stack in which steroid dosages decrease over the duration of the cycle. This pattern has an advantage over the other patterns, from a health perspective, because a decreasing dose pattern of steroid use limits the risks of adverse side effects. This pattern is seen in many bodybuilders during the precompetition phase of their training - the rationale being that this pattern will result in very low levels of drugs in the bodybuilders' system near or at the time of a drug test.

14 week cycle:

Weeks 1-7

Amount taken according to personal preference

Weeks 8-11

Winny-V 50mg/3days

Weeks 8-10

Proviron 2tabs/day

Week 8

Dianabol 35mg/day

Week 9

Dianabol 30mg/day

Week 10

Dianabol 25mg/day

Week 11

Dianabol 20mg/day

Week 11-13

Proviron 1tab/day

Week 12

Dianabol 10mg/day

Winny-V stopped

Week 13

Dianabol 5mg/day

Week 14

All drugs stopped

Pyramid Pattern

The "pyramid" pattern is characterized by a cycle that can be broken down into three consecutive phases. The first phase is the one of increasing dosage, the second phase is the highest dosage reached, and the third phase is marked by a decreasing dosage. Once again, as with the "ski-slope" pattern, this pattern is favored as a precompetion cycle. Because it leaves low levels of drugs in the system, the bodybuilder has a better chance of passing a drug test. As most of you may know, this is the most popular cycles in professional and hobbist bodybuilders. This is a proven cycle that usually makes great gains for all who experiment with it.

15 week cycle

Weeks 1-8

Primobolan (oral) 100mg/day

Weeks 1-2

Winstrol (oral) 4mg/day

Maxibolan (oral) 4mg/day

Weeks 3-5

Winstrol (oral) 6mg/day

Maxibolan (oral) 6mg/day

Weeks 6-10

Winstrol (oral) 4mg/day

Maxibolan (oral) 4mg/day

Weeks 8-14

Primobolan (oral) 50mg/day

Weeks 11-12

Winstrol (oral) 2mg/day

Maxibolan (oral) 2mg/day

Week 15

All drugs stopped

Part 2

Primobolan Acetate - The Dieting Steroid

Primobolan Acetate which is the tablet form is considered one of the safest steroids to use. It is quite popular with novices and women athletes. Primo tabs are very low in androgens, and are highly anabolic. However, Primo had not typically promoted dramatic size and strength increases, as it had only a limited effect in having built up muscle mass and strength; there had been reports that quality muscle gains had been achieved while having used this product. A great feature of using Primo tabs is that the muscle achieved is muscle you keep. Another useful feature is that along with Trenbolone Acetate, Primo is still effective on a bodybuilder that is restricting his/her calorie intake.

Bodybuilders had often administered Primobolan over a prolonged period of time, as it had provided a slow, but high-quality muscle gains, again which are kept after discontinuation of use. Primobolan tabs are one of the most popular steroids used by bodybuilders in a pre-contest phase for its aforementioned qualities. In addition, it is eliminated by the bodybuilders system very quickly. Some report that Primo tabs can be used up until 3 weeks before a drug-tested competition.

Some claim that the administration of Primo tabs had proven to help the body burn fat as a source of energy. Keep in mind that Primo Acetate should never be used exclusively taken during a restricted caloric intake, due to its extremely low androgenic effect. If used this way, there is a chance that you may lose muscle and strength, which can also increase the chance of overtraining. A very popular steroid to stack with Primo on a cutting cycle is Winstrol.

Lets look at the make-up of Primobolan Tablets.

Chemical Name: Methenolone Acetate

Manufacturer: Schering

Storage: Primo tabs should be protected from light and moisture. You should

keep the tabs in the blisters until ready for ingestion. You should store

them at controlled room temperature 59 to 86 degrees F.

Ingredient: 5mg Methenolone Acetate

One of the most common mistakes that most bodybuilders make is not using an effective dosage. Primobolan tablets are not 17-alpha alkylated, therefore they are passed through the gastrointestinal tract, then into the liver, where a large portion of the substance had been destroyed and ultimately deactivated, having only left a much smaller portion of the substance to get into the blood. I have seen novice bodybuilders ingest 3-5 tabs a day, which is a waste of good steroid and money. That is why sometimes Primo is given a bad reputation of being an ineffective steroid. But due to its chemical nature, high quantites taken orally are needed to gain effectiveness. But there are ways to use less and get more.

Due to the fact that the Primo tabs had an effect on fat burning , but, consequently, had been mostly deactivated in the liver; many athletes have most efficiently applied this compound directly to the problem areas. This practice had permitted for the penetration of the substance to have been absorbed directly into the blood through the skin, in areas where undesired fat deposits had existed. this had also been conceivable by the assistance of DMSO compound. DMSO had been one of the few substances which had been fully absorbed through the skin, which had allowed the skin to have become permeable to other substances which could have been distributed through the body. The thing about using the DMSO method allows the user to use less Primo tabs than if you administered them orally. For an effective dose, all you need is a minimum of 5 5mg tabs, crush them up into a fine powder, mix them with a 50/50 mixture of DMSO gel and water. The mixture is then applied to problematic fatty areas. When I mean applied, I mean it is layed on the skin and not rubbed in. The applied area is then covered with Saran wrap to trap in heat to make the transfer faster. This should be kept on the skin for at least 40 minutes.

Another method using the DMSO compound is to again grind up the 5, 5mg tablets and mix them with the DMSO liquid. Using a 22 guage pour the ground up tablets into the syringe, then draw up 2cc's of DMSO liquid. Shake the mixture thoroughly and inject it. This is ideal for putting the Primo Acetate directly in contact with the bloodstream which will not be broken down. Your body's natural defenses will break down the binders and fillers. Injecting liquid DMSO is safe and has healing capabilities.

Another feasible method that a bodybuilder can use to ingest the tablets and avoid the steroid from being broken down by the liver, thus being destoyed, is to again grind up 5 tablets and mix them with Vitamin E oil. You can obtain the oil by buying 1000mg vitamin E softgels. The Vitamin E can be withdrawn by poking a small hole in the softgel by using a stick pin or a needle of some sort and squeezing the oil out of the hole into a smooth glass. Using a formula of the oil from 4 each 1000 iu Vitamin E softgels with 5 crushed tablets mixed together in a smooth glass mixed well and heated by use of a microwave. The mixture is swallowed. This method allegedly had allowed the Primo tabs combined with the Vitamin E mixture, to have reached the blood through the lymph system, which had prevented the solution from having reached the liver through the portal vessel. A word of warning: Do not heat the mixture in the microwave for long periods. And the solution is not the best tasting.

Primo tabs are one of the safest steroids. They are not 17 alpha-alkylated so they are almost non-toxic to the liver. Also, Primo is not easily subject to aromatization, it does not give a threat to feminization characteristics.

Primobolan tablets are individually welded into silver colored aluminum blisters. There are 3 strips of 10 tablets in each package, for a total of 30 tablets. Primobolan tabletas, Schering Mexico and the Reg. #58504 is displayed throughout the silver strip, in black ink.


Part 3

Drug Testing Facts, Fictions and Tips to beating them!



TEST STANDARDS AND ACCURACY

The accuracy of drug testing is an area where I've decided to neglect all statistics. Those who oppose drug testing provide numbers indicating a high level of false positives. Those who favor drug testing provide numbers indicating high levels of accuracy. The fact is that accuracy

varies widely from lab to lab. Generally speaking, NIDA labs are accurate.



NIDA (The National Institute of Drug Abuse) is the government organization responsible for regulating the drug-testing industry. The vast majority of urine drug screens done these days conform to NIDA specs, and ALL testing associated with the government (department of transportation, etc.) complies with the NIDA standard. It is NIDA that decides what the "safe" cutoffs are to avoid false positives....

Despite what you might hear on the net, urinalysis, if done correctly, is a very accurate scientific procedure. I know of no labs that simply report the results of the initial EMIT screening

without confirming the sample on GC/MS. The fact is, labs WANT you to test negative, because then they only have to run an EMIT test on your urine (a few cents). If you test positive, they must

then confirm the positive result on GC/MS, which is considerably more expensive. . . . Incidentally, the machine which tests the hair is a relative of the GC/MS, but is FAR more precise. It can

accurately detect levels of THC in a solution that are below 1 ng/mL!

CAP (College of American Pathologists) also certifies laboratories the way NIDA does. NIDA keeps it's labs in check by sending positive and negative double-blind samples. Lab personnel do not know what samples came from NIDA. If the lab results are wrong, NIDA may take away the labs certification. Only labs that perform the GC/MS on site can be NIDA certified. Labs that send samples to another laboratory for GC/MS confirmation are ineligible for NIDA certification. "Drug testing when done properly with all required controls and confirmation procedures is

very accurate and reliable".

Not all labs are NIDA/CAP certified. Some labs do not properly and thoroughly clean the GC/MS equipment. Some labs don't even do a GC/MS confirmation! Some labs use cheap alternative methods to reduce expenses. Many human errors occur in labs and cause inaccurate results. Some are careless or irresponsible errors, and some errors are accidents. Human error can ruin the results of ANY test, screening or confirmation GC/MS.

The only lab you should be concerned with is the one that is testing you. Only Federal jobs require NIDA standards. Your typical private employer may use any lab s/he chooses, which would very likely be the least expensive. Businesses don't always choose NIDA labs that follow-up a positive screening test with a confirmation GC/MS.

Procedures used:

In the workplace, an EMIT screening is typically used, with a CG/MS confirmation if the EMIT is positive. However, this is not a rule; employers can, and some do, use unusual procedures. Some employers use the RIA, and some use the hair test. The government uses RIA. They may or may not supervise the subject. Olympic athletes must be monitored by courier after a competition. The courier stays with the athlete until the athlete urinates, with a time frame of up to sixty minutes.



False positives:

No laboratory process is completely free from error. The GC/MS test is virtually error free, but the EMIT is far from accurate. There are some false positives you should avoid if you're getting an EMIT test. Take this seriously; false positives run high. If you know that there will be a GC/MS confirmation test, you can disregard this section. It would be too lengthy to list all of the false positives here. Jeff Nightbyrd's "Conquering the Urine Tests" pamphlet lists a majority of the

false positives in detail. (If you are clean, want to get back at the testing industry for conducting these absurd tests, and know that there will be a confirmation test, you could consume several false positives. This would force labs to pay for the high priced GC/MS test, eventually drive up test expenses. You will still pass the test as long as you didn't use any true positives.


Innocent Products that can cause a False Positive on a Drug Test

Ibuprofen:

Ibuprofen is a common pain reliever that (even in low dosages) used to cause a false THC positive on the EMIT test. The EMIT has been changed to use a different enzyme to eliminate false positives due to Ibuprofen. Ibuprofen in very high doses will still interfere with both the EMIT and the GC/MS. There is some conflicting data here because some sources say that the GC/MS tests can distinguish between Ibuprofen and THC (as well as other over-the-counter drugs).

Cold remedies, pain relievers, hay fever remedies, & diet pills:

Decongestants and diet pills result in false positives for amphetamine use in one third of the test samples given to 40 of the countries leading laboratories. There are roughly 300 over-the-counter drugs that cause false positives on the EMIT.

Antibiotics: Certain antibiotics (like Amoxicillin) are claimed to cause a positive for heroin or cocaine. This has not been verified, so there is some uncertainty here.

Melanin (black skin):

Melanin is the brown pigment that protects your skin from UV rays. It was raised as a discrimination issue in the 1980's, and argued that melanin's molecular structure is similar to that of a THC metabolite. Subsequent research revealed flaws in the data. Melanin was found to have no effect on THC metabolite testing.

DHEA:

DHEA taken by AIDS patients will cause a false positive for anabolic steroid use.

Dental treatment:

Caine products (like novacaine) used in dentistry have been known to cause false positives for cocaine. Make sure you let it be known if you have had a visit to the dentist recently and you were administered novacaine.

Innocent Products that can cause a True Positive on a Drug Test

True positives (legitimate): Some legal products actually contain small amounts of illegal chemicals. All tests, including the GC/MS, will test you positive because the metabolites derived from the true positive are identical to the metabolites of the illegal drugs. One exception: poppy seeds will not cause a positive GC/MS (explained below).

Poppy seeds:

Poppy seeds, usually on breads, contain traces of morphine, and lead to positives for opiates. According to experts, eating a pastry filled with poppy seeds will bring results showing that you are a *high level* opiate user. Harold Crossley, a nationally known chemical dependency expert, said you would have to eat 100 poppy seed bagels to score a positive on a drug test. When taken into account that very few poppy seeds are sprinkled on bagels, you can see that poppy seeds from a hundred poppy seed bagels will easily fill a single large pastry. Purim cookies, a Jewish food known as Hamantashen, may have five to six tablespoons of poppy seeds. A couple Purim cookies may cause a positive test. Poppy seeds can be distinguished from illicit drugs on the GC/MS test. Although poppy seeds have the same metabolites as opium, these metabolites are shown to have different patterns when viewed with the GC/MS.

Testosterone supplements:

Orchic extract (found in bull's balls) will give a positive for anabolic steroid use. It is a legitimate

substance that causes the test to imply that you abuse steroids. The Androstene, AndroDiol,

4-Andro, 5-Andro, and the 19-Nor products that bodybuilders and athletes use can cause a true positive on the drug tests. Remember to let them know that you are using these legal supplements before submitting to a drug test.

A NOTE ON COMMERCIAL PRODUCTS

There are commercial and household products that will help you pass the test. Some people are object to commercial products because they "are just trying to cash in on the War on Drugs." They also charge high prices and water alone tends to work for most. Also, be aware that Texas outlawed products with the sole purpose of creating negative results on urine tests. I have put a (c) next to the commercial products to indicate that they are developed specifically for beating the test. Those of you that reside in Texas can skip items with a (c). Ignore money-back guarantees. Companys that suck in thousands of High Times readers make so much, that a few returns from motivated users are insignificant. People could even get away with offering a money-back guarentee for Goldenseal because all the water that people drink with Goldenseal causes most of them to pass. Some companys don't keep their word. A urinator who tested positive sent the lab results back, only to be told that marijuana is illegal. He was not even compensated for buying a failing product.

THINGS TESTED TO DETECT COUNTER MEASURES

Laboratories know how easy it is to tamper with urine samples and alter the results. Labs often do tests to find out if the sample is legitimate.

Color:

If a urine sample looks clear, the lab will suspect that it's watered down. They can't report it as positive, but they may reject the sample and inform your employer that you tried to beat the test. If this happens, the sample might as well be positive, because you won't get hired. Take Vitamin B complex to color your urine yellow.

Temperature:

Urine should be between 91 and 97 degrees. NIDA certified labs will verify temperature. If it isn't, they will suspect you added water to the cup, or used substitution. Disposable pocket hand warmers (sold in department stores) will keep a urine sample warm, provided that the urine is in a con*** or douche bag.

Creatinine:

Creatinine is a substance produced by vertebrates, and it shows up in urine. If someone substitutes their urine with something other than urine, like Mountain Dew, they will test negative for drugs. The

testee will most likely not get away with it because Mountain Dew contains zero creatinine, and labs test creatinine levels to ensure that the sample is valid. Creatinine levels drop below normal when people dilute their urine. This tests to ensure that the subject didn't drink unusual amounts of water. An *accurate* creatinine "clearance" test would require a urine and blood test 24 hours before the drug test to determine the normal creatinine level for that individual. This is almost never done. You hould still be cautious because they do often use the inaccurate method of comparing your creatinine level during the drug test to an average. Eating foods rich in protein like red meat will slightly increase creatinine levels. There is no significant variation between vegatarians and armavors, so the effect protein has is little. Sexual activity also raises creatinine levels. I doubt sexual activity influences creatinine level with much significance. However, a vegetarian that doesn't have much sex should be concerned. People who are drug-free sometimes lose their jobs for having too low of a creatinine level.

pH:

pH is often changed when people spike their sample with household products. Use caution when doping urine, pH is usually tested.

Specific gravity:

An unusual specific gravity indicates that a sample has been tampered with.

Age:

Age can not be tested using urine. There is a rumor that approximate age can be detected in urine, and is tested in medical insurance exams. It's a myth.

Gender:

Gender cannot be tested either. As with age, there is a rumor that gender can be detected in urine, and is tested in medical insurance exams. It's another myth. It may be argued that a pregnancy test can be used to detect the gender of the urine provider, but the same test is used to detect prostate cancer in males.

PRODUCING CLEAN URINE

THC is fat soluble, and it gets stored in your fat cells. Cleaning it out of your lipid tissue is very difficult. Many herbal products claim to clean out your system, yet they do nothing to remove THC byproducts from fat cells. A study was done in Germany in 1993 on 50 of the most common herbs used by people trying to pass the test. All 50 herbs failed to cause a negative. Unfortunately, this rumor will not die. Goldenseal (plant) is useless; yet it's the most common thing for people to use. The only way to extract THC from fat cells is to exercise. Fat cells secrete fat with THC metabolites at a constant rate, regardless of what herbs you consume. You may be able to temporarily clean THC metabolites from your bloodstream, or dilute your fluids to yield a larger urine/THC ratio, but your bloodstream will continue collecting THC metabolites from fat. Your urine will continue collecting THC metabolites from your bloodstream.

Dilution:

Hyper saturating your body with fluids will dilute metabolites possibly below the 50 ng/mL threshold, depending on your metabolism. Be aware that creatinine levels are often tested, and will show that the sample has been diluted. Diluting your sample will also produce clear urine, with virtually no yellow color. They will assume that you've diluted your sample, and they may reject your sample on the basis of color alone. It's only necessary to start drinking just before the test. Those who drown themselves in fluid days before a test are only causing unnecessary discomfort. Those who stay up all night drinking don't have any better chance than one who drinks heavily first thing in the morning. Get up early if the test is early, but don't lose sleep over a test that's given in the daytime.

Water:

Drink at least eight hefty glasses of fluid (preferably water) just prior to the test. Many people start drinking water several days before the test; which is useless. Water does not clean any THC metabolites out of your system because THC is not water soluble. Water only dilutes urine temporarily. Do not over do it; you can get water intoxication. People can actually overdose and even die from water intoxication. It's very hard to do, and you'll vomit before anything gets serious.

Creatinine level:

Eating red meat will boost creatinine levels. If you eat a lot of red meat for the 3 days prior to the test, your creatinine level will be normal, and the lab won't know that you've diluted your urine

sample.

Vitamin B:

Color your sample yellow by taking 50 to 100 milligrams of vitamin B. Many vitamins will work, but B-2 or B-12 (found in B-complex vitamins) are the most effective, though some will argue that

Vitamin C is better. This will also help if you plan to dope your sample (section 7). This does not guarantee that dilution will work. Diluted samples have been red-flagged when specific gravity and creatinine levels are tested and below normal. If you're taking vitamins at the last minute, check to see if they're time release. If so, crush it up and consume the powder. Coloring your urine isn't all that important because it's normal for people to have clear urine even when they don't consume much fluid.

Diuretics:

Diuretics make people urinate frequently. Coffee, cranberry juice, beer, iced tea, herbal tea, and Pepsi are all good diuretics. Grapes are known to be very good diuretics. Diuretics without caffeine or alcohol are recommended because caffeine and alcohol have negative side effects. Cranberry juice is also the cheapest. Avoid salts. Herbal diuretics do better than home remedies like juices.

Ultimate Blend (c):

This product used to be known as Test Free, but the name was changed. Ultimate Blend is a diuretic designed for the test, but works no better than other diuretics. Ultimate Blend is sold by Zydot Unlimited Inc.



Detoxify Carbo Clean (c):

This is a very new product, untested by a third party. It claims to absorb toxins, however, experts say that absorbing THC metabolites from fat cells is impossible. Here is a copy of the ad from Party Hut Enterprizes:

[Detox] Is a scientifically formulated carbohydrate blend that works by absorbing toxins and imuurities[sic]. It has been featured in High Times, and we are so confident of the results

that we are offering a double-your-money-back guarantee for any failed results. This is the most complete program for the cleanest results! Precleanse (tm) herbal capsules are enclosed in

every box of Carbo Clean. This extra advantage helps you begin cleansing the evening before the deadline. B-Complex tablets complete the program.

Naturally Klean Herbal Tea (c):

Naturally Klean claims to clear any drug metabolites for a few hours after taking. Drink this shortly before the test. Naturally Klean was also listed as a drug screen in previous versions, but according to experts, "it will do NOTHING to help you pass a urine test;" with the exception that it will dilute your urine. You can get Naturally Klean from Martha Butterfield-Jay Foundation or J&J Enterprizes. An anonymous user provided the ingredients list: dandelion root, burdock root, red clover top, chamomile flower, alfalfa leaf, licorice root, slippery elm inner bark, hibiscus flower, dog rose hips,

natural fruit flavors. Dandelion root is said to be the effective diuretic.

Goldenseal:

Goldenseal is a plant and you can get either the root or the leaves in pill form. It's also a liquid or tea. The liquid is rumored to absorb slower than the capsules. Goldenseal is a diuretic, but works no better than other diuretics. Furthermore, NORML reports that Goldenseal is now being tested for. Taking Goldenseal is a foolish waste.

Certa or Certo:

This is an untested diuretic. Certa has something to do with canning. Some people swear by it. Trouble is, it's always somebody else, a third party not present during the conversation, who uses

it. I've heard rumors about people who smoked right up to the day before the test, consumed fruit pectin (a canning substance similar to Certa), and passed the test. However, there hasn't been any tests to validate those claims.

Vales Original Formula:

Another herbal remedy like Goldenseal. It does nothing. The water you must take with it does everything Vales claims to do.

Lasix:

Take an 80 milligram dose of prescription diuretic lasix (furosemide). Prescription diuretics are the most potent. Some over the counter diuretics will color your urine blue and should be avoided.

WARNING! -Diuretics can be harmful to people with kidney problems, pregnant women, and diabetics.

Vinegar:

There is a myth that drinking vinegar will mask drugs; it won't. However, vinegar lowers the pH of urine. Amphetamines are excreted up to 3 times as fast when urine is acidified. So vinegar could reduce the detection time period for amphetamines. The effects on detection time are generally insignificant, and it in my opinion it really wouldn't be worth it to drink vinegar. If you do decide to drink vinegar, I hear it's easiest to get a shot glass and do it in shots. It will cause diarrhea.

Dexatrim:

There is a myth that taking phenylpropanolamine (Dexatrim's active ingredient) will work. It won't. In fact, Dexatrim is a false positive, and may work against you. The myth may have originated because Dexatrim was claimed to speed metabolism. However, the fact that Dextrim causes a positive makes it useless.

Fiber:

A high fiber diet will help by redirecting fat soluble metabolites to the colon rather than bladder. THC is eliminated primarily in the stool via bile acids. Both EMIT and RIA detect a secondary metabolite which is reabsorbed from the intestines. Thus a person with a high fiber diet will excrete a majority of THC [metabolites] in the stool. A fiber-based laxitive will also help by binding bile-acids. Use caution. Fiber laxitives can alter one's bowel schedule and lead to dependancy.

Vitamin lecithin:

A recent method that's still under development is to take vitamin lecithin. This vitamin breaks down your stored fat and disperses it into your blood stream, to help clean out drugs that store

themselves in lipid tissue, such as THC. NORML recommends taking Lecithin right up to the day of the test. To me it sounds as though this would work against you because by putting THC back in your blood stream, you are increasing metabolites in the urine. Someone has suggested that you take vitamin lecithin on a regular basis to clean lipids of THC metabolites. Then quit before the test, which seems to make more sense. It MAY be useless to take lecithin supplements orally. I've been told that the digestive system breaks it down too much before entering the blood stream. Most aren't willing to take vitamins intravenously. (If you do decide to take lecithin, you might as well take B5 with it. B5 aids in the process of turning lecithin into acetylcholine.) Another solution is to take nutrients which help the body manufacture lecithin. Lipotrophics cause the liver to produce lecithin.

HOW TO GIVE A CLEAN SAMPLE:

Don't give urine from your first urination of the day. It's the dirtiest, and can be heavily filled with

metabolites. Urinate a couple of times before giving a test sample. Also, don't give the beginning or end of the stream. Piss in the toilet, then quickly stop and go in the cup. Stop, and shift back to the toilet for the last portion. Only give a midstream sample. Just be sure to give 60 cc's.

Exercise:

Athletes have a big advantage over normal civilians. When fat is burned, THC byproducts are released into the blood. This is the only way to get THC metabolites out of lipid tissue. Normal living will burn them slowly, as your fat reserves get turned over. Due to an athletes high metabolic rate, THC moves through an athletes system significantly faster. Exercising between drug tests will clean THC metabolites from the system at a faster rate, thus lowering the detection period. It is important to stop burning fat cells near test time. On test day, it doesn't matter what's in your lipid tissue. What's in your blood and urine does matter. Exercise increases the amount of THC metabolites inthe urine; so quit exercising a week before the test. Be lazy, and eat big. This will put the body in an anabolic fat-storing stage. At this point, the "buried" THC metabolites won't escape and go the the urine. There are drugs that will increase metabolism the way exercise does, but these are the same drugs that they are usually testing for. Exercise should only be considered when the subject knows that he or she will not be given a pop quiz in the near future.

Beta-2 agonists:

Studies have shown that Clenbuterol reduces fat, which would help rid lipid tissue of THC metabolities. Clenbuterol also increases metabolism. No studies have directly shown that Clenbuterol will help pass a drug test. However, provided that it reduces fat, I would assume that the fat breakdown would result in less fat soluble substances in the system. Caution: Clenbuterol is labeled as a performance enhancer, and it's on the banned list for athlete testing. If are being tested as an athlete, avoid Clenbuterol!

Beta-3 agonists:

Beta-3 agonists are drugs that stimulate the beta-3 andrenergic receptors on brown fat cells. The beta-3 andrenergic receptor is located on the surface of fat cells, and controls the amount of fat the

cell releases into the bloodstream. When brown fat is stimulated, white fat is burned (converted into heat). Many people have mutant beta-3 andrenergic receptors, causing calories to be burned too slowly; thus leading to obesity. These people will benefit most from beta-3 agonist drugs. If the drug works as claimed, I believe it would reduce the detection time of fat soluble drugs by continually excreting metabolites into the bloodstream at a faster pace. As with vitamin lecithin and exercise, you would take beta-3 agonists between tests, and quit a couple days prior to the test. Beta-3 agonists have been in the development phase for the past 13 years. One firm is already testing a beta-3 drug in early clinical trials. It's not on the market yet.

Low dosaging:

If you're an athlete and get tested for steroids, you can still use anabolic steroids and possibly beat the cutoff. The body naturally produces testosterone (a steroid), and small amounts of

testosterone show up in urine by default. Some athletes are able to keep their steroid intake low enough to indicate a natural level of steroids. A study was done finding that 67% of steroid users take more than the recommended amount, and they stack.

DRUG SCREENS

Some chemicals taken orally supposedly will mask traces of drugs in urine. Advertisers like to present their diuretic as a masking agent to make the sale. Consequently, diuretics are often mistaken for drug screens. Most herbal products claim to do a lot more than they actually do. Don't be fooled by herbal potions that claim to flush or absorb toxins.

DRUG SCREENS THAT WORK:


Aspirin:

According to Jeff Nightbyrd, there is testing industry data that taking 4 aspirins a few hours prior to the test might help you. ". . . aspirin interferes with the Syvia [sic] EMIT assay. It seems that

aspirin absorbs at the same wavelength that NAD does which is how it interferes with the assay" (Clin Chem 34 (90) 602-606). Two reliable sources have tested aspirin and found it to interfere with the EMIT. In the future they will try to find a way to circumvent this test flaw. Until then, I certainly recommend taking advantage of the situation and using aspirin.

DRUG SCREENS THAT DO NOT WORK:

Goldenseal:

Goldenseal has shown to work on occasion. However, some labs are reportedly testing for Goldenseal. Goldenseal is very unreliable, and California NORML advises against using it. Goldenseal (as a screen) only works on the TLC test, which is not used anymore.

Niacin:

Niacin has been shown to work on occasion. Byrd Labs tests conclude that niacin doesn't work at all. In other words, something else probably caused a negative, not the niacin.

Zinc sulfate:

Zinc sulfate is claimed to bond with THC metabolites, and because it's a solid, it gets passed as stool rather than urine. Experts say it does nothing.

UNTESTED DRUG SCREENS:

Puri-Blend (c):

Puri-Blend is claimed to "block" metabolites from entering the bloodstream and to "neutralize" all drugs in the urine. I don't believe it myself. Sold in GNC stores.

The Stuff (c):

The Stuff is claimed to absorb toxins in the body and block detection of true and false positives. Sold by J&J Enterprises.



DOPING SAMPLES

"Doping" samples consists of spiking the sample with different chemicals. Chemicals that defeat immunoglobulin/antigen binding will cause a false negative on the EMIT. Most of these additives only work on the standard EMIT screening, not on RIA or GC/MS tests. In many cases, passing the EMIT is good enough, because they will never do a RIA or GC/MS confirmation on a sample that showed negative. I should also add that you may be watched, so don't rely on this method. You should be able to find out ahead of time if you will be supervised. Some of the following additives alter the urine's pH, and most labs now test the pH to see if the sample has been adulterated. If you are subject to ran*** tests, you may want to carry an additive in your wallet. Additives are illegal in the state of Texas, and commercial vendors will not ship their product to Texas addresses.

Effective additives: These additives are recommended.


Bleach (powdered):

Chlorinated bleach will test negative, and it's the best household additive. In an emergency, experts recommend adding unscented bleach crystals to a diluted sample. It's recommended to grind the powdered bleach to a finer grain. 1/4 teaspoon is recommended for a 60cc sample. For liquid bleach, add six to ten drops. Bleach will throw the pH outside the normal body range; so it may be apparent that the sample was tampered with. Some bleaches foam or leave residue, so experiment with different brands before selecting which to use.

Klear (c):

Klear is a powdered additive. Jeff Nightbyrd, Ann Waters Pearson, and Party Hut Enterprises currently endorses Klear. It is the most advanced and least detectable. Klear will clear up THC metabolites, as well as nicotine byproducts on the EMIT. If methamphetamines are present, Klear won't help. Klear is only designed to work on the EMIT. It will also work on the RIA when there is a good time span between the urine getting spiked, and getting tested. If the RIA test is not performed on-site, there is a good chance Klear will cause a false negative. Klear can be purchased from Martha Butterfield-Jay Foundation and Party Hut Enterprizes now carries. You can also get Klear direct from Klear (the organization).

Water:

You can dilute your sample heavily with water. Don't confuse this with drinking water; you can also add water directly to the sample. Be sure to use hot water (between 91 and 97 degrees), they will

likely take the temperature of the sample. This method isn't dependable because some facilities have the sink water shut off so people can't do this. If there is running water, they may listen to you. If you turn on the water, make it sound like you're washing your hands or something.

Ineffective additives:

These additives are not recommended. Many of these may give negative test results, but are not recommended for other reasons.

Ammonia:

2 ounces will render the sample negative. The pH is altered, and the ammonia odor is strong enough to be recognized.

Blood:

It's been said that a few drops of blood will fix your sample; it doesn't.

Draino:

Draino will test negative. However, Draino is NOT recommended because it doesn't work well even when half a teaspoon is added. It colors the sample blue, and will put the pH outside the normal body range. Draino foams, and leaves metal specs that must be removed.

Goldenseal:

A myth. Goldenseal put directly in the sample doesn't alter test results. It only turns the specimen brown. Do not dope your urine with Goldenseal. Goldenseal is more commonly used as a screen, to be consumed.

Hydrogen Peroxide:

Industrial grade will destroy half the THC metabolites. Household strength hydrogen peroxide does nothing. 30% H2O2 may "oxidize the THC metabolite into something that would not react in the screening test and would show up as something different by GC/MS".

Lemon juice:

Lemon juice is a myth; it will not change the test results.

Liquid soap:

Will test negative, but makes the specimen cloudy, which certainly draws suspicion.

Mary Jane's SuperClean 13 (c):

This additive was effective for a very short period. SuperClean had to be strong enough to beat the tests, but weak enough to be undetectable. It failed to cause a false-negative in 3% of the tests. In fact, it also causes a false-positive on the EMIT for alcohol! Don't use it.

Purifyit (c):

Imported from Europe, Party Hut Enterprises sells Purifyit with a money-back guarantee. PHE claims there have been no returns. Oklahoma NORML refuses to endorse this product because it has flunked too many truck drivers.

Sodium nitrate:

This is more effective than table salt (below), but dissolves poorly.

Table salt:

Two tablespoons of salt will test negative, but puts the density out of normal range. Residue can also be seen at the bottom of the cup.

UrinAid (c):

UrinAid, produced by Byrd Labs, is very potent and works every time for masking pot and nicotine, but not cocaine or heroin. They have recently developed a test solely to detect UrinAid. UrinAid is

tested for in 5% of the labs. Oklahoma NORML has stopped selling this product because it's "too detectable."



Vinegar:

Adding vinegar to your sample will test negative, but also drops the pH. In fact, lowering the pH is what causes the sample to test negative. "If the urine is extremely acidic or alkaline the

antigen-antibody reaction will proceed at a slower rate which COULD produce a false negative". This method is not recommended because if you are lucky and lower the pH enough to produce a negative, there's a chance that the pH itself will also be tested.

Visine:

This is debatable. Byrd Labs concluded that Visine does not work. Clinton said that the lab he worked in tested Visine, and concluded that Visine works every time as a false negative for the EMIT. It can be detected due to inability of the sample to foam.

WD40:

Another myth. WD40 can only do harm.

Untested additives

Papain:

This is a papaya enzyme available over the counter. It isn't known whether this does anything. People say that Papain is an antibody to THC, and in theory may destroy THC when added to the urine sample. However, positive urine doesn't actually contain THC; it contains THC byproducts. Papain has not been tested, and may or may not work.

SUBSTITUTION

This method works for every urine test, every time (provided that some conditions are met). You simply give them clean urine (not yours). This works very well if you're not supervised. If you are going to be supervised, try to talk them out of it. Someone told me they were going to be monitored, and they said "I don't want you to fuckin' watch me piss!" So the supervisor waited outside; probably with his/her ear to the door to listen for opening containers. Members in active

duty are often watched as the urine flows from source to destination (but substitution will even work on this test, as you will find out). Abbie Hoffman, author of "Stealing This Urine Test," suggested leaving a few drops of urine on the seat or on your shoe for as "an added measure of authenticity."

Substitution Method

You have to be brave and determined to use it them. The most common way to sneak in urine is in a concealed container.

Concealed container:

Simply conceal the urine. The first time you're alone with the container they give you, dump in your concealed urine. Be sure you can quietly open the container; the lab personnel may be just outside the door listening. You may be required to change into a gown. If so, a con*** or douche bag holding the sample and taped around the thigh can be concealed under the gown. You can also run a plastic line from a flexible container and tape it to your urination equipment (to be gender neutral), and even piss under supervision. Females have been known to keep a con*** with the urine sample in the vagina, and prick it with a sharp fingernail to piss under supervision. Be sure to keep the sample between 91 and 97 degrees.

Where to get clean urine.

Urine from a donor:

You can substitute someone else's urine. Ask your urine donor (hopefully a friend you can trust) what drugs they've taken in the last month. They may have taken a false positive (or a true

positive for that matter). Before the test, the examiner will likely ask you to list everything you've taken. If the urine ages beyond 18 hours, deterioration becomes noticable and the lab may suspect something.

Powdered urine:

If you don't trust your friend's sample, or don't have any clean friends, you can get powdered urine from Martha Butterfield-Jay Foundation. It's produced by Byrd Labs, and supposedly works perfectly; however, I got MBJF's powdered urine, and it did not specify the age or gender of the original sample. Powdered urine must be prepared ahead of time. If there is a period of time that you are clean, you can make powdered urine from your own supply.

Making your own powdered urine:

Urinate in a glass container. Let it evaporate. Then scrape the inside for the concentrate. Just mix it with water before the test, and the sample will have the correct specific gravity, pH, color, etc. This is a grand idea. Do this when you are clean of pot, or other illicit drugs and it will keep. For bodybuilders, do this when your off the cycle and had sufficient time to be clean. However keep in mind that Nandralone metabolites can stay in your system for a very long time.

Dog urine:

I heard that dog urine (of all things) can be substituted, and will pass the test! However, I don't know how an age, gender, pH, or creatinine test would result. Someone was able to use dog

urine for several months to pass the test. This subsection assumes you have a clean dog. (Ha Ha) than humans do. It would make more sense to use human urine, but dog urine provides a workable substitution in an emergency.

IF YOU FAIL

If you fail the test, raise hell. Failing the drug test has been known to make a quiet person go ballistic. You will be interviewed by a medical review official (MRO), who would try to find out why you tested positive. MRO's are NOT impartial. An MRO is an employee of the lab, and is there for quality control. They are also there to protect the lab by coercing the court into thinking that the person who failed is a drug abuser. "Anything you say to an MRO can and will be used against you" (RDW). If you fight it, your lawyer "can subpoena the proficiency testing records of the laboratory for review". These questions should be asked about the lab you are challenging:

0 How does the lab handle samples?

1 Are they NIDA/CAP certified?

2 Do they participate in appropriate proficiency testing?

3 What is their track records in the proficiency testing program?

4 Have they ever failed a proficiency test?

5 What are the qualifications of the technical staff performing the test?



What technologies do they use to screen and confirm?

SOURCES

Nightbyrd, Jeff (founder of Byrd Labs): Nightbyrd is the author of the "Conquering the Urine Tests" pamphlet. His 11th edition was updated in 1996 and is out via snail-mail for $5. The pamphlet provides some more elaborate information, and includes statistics and stories. Nightbyrd has worked several years on protecting workers civil rights. If anyone has a related law suit underway, Mr. Nightbyrd has one of the most extensive libraries of materials in the country. E-mail <[email protected]>; Voice 800/480-2468; FAX 512/478-7706.

Pearson, Anne Watters (founder of Martha Butterfield-Jay Foundation): Pearson is devoted to counseling and coaching people faced with piss testing. E-mail <[email protected]>.

Byrd Labs: Jeff Nightbyrd's creation. Byrd labs has run more than 2,000 tests on urine and additives. 800/333-2152

California NORML: 415/563-5858; e-mail <[email protected]>.

CAPP: Hi tech workers rights organization. 512/448-4804

Drug Testing Hotline in California: 900/844-test

J&J Enterprizes (aka Free*** Wholesalers): Distributes The Stuff and

Naturally Klean Herbal Tea Direct questions to 800/883-3869. FAX

orders to 303/765-5732. Snail-Mail: PO Box 102311, Denver, CO 80250.

http://www.imall.com/stores/stuff

Klear: 40 4th Street #216, Petaluma, CA 94952 800/661-1357

Martha Butterfield-Jay Foundation (Oklahoma NORML): MBJF sent me free

literature, and a brochure on of their products. If you call, a

machine will answer. Calls will be returned collect. P.O. Box 57214,

Oklahoma City, OK 73157 405/521-URIN



NORML: NORML operates a Drug Testing & Information Hotline. I don't

recommend this hotline. People have called this line needing important

drug testing information in a hurry, only to get a recording. For the

price, I would expect a live person. The charge is $2.95 per minute.

900/97-NORML. 1636 'R' St. N.W., 3rd Floor, Washington D.C. 20009

NORML Legal Referral: 202/483-5500

Party Hut Enterprises: Carbo Clean, Purifyit, and Klear are $30 each. The

purchaser pays COD and shipping. They do accept pre-paid orders. If

you would like to have more information about this product or a catalog

of the 100's of other products that they carry just e-mail Charles

Alvis. <[email protected]> or <[email protected]>. They also have an

online headshop located at GO.com - Official Home Page

Performance Factors: Makes video imparment test. 415/769-8300

PharmChem Laborities Inc.: Boycott PharmChem for supplying the sweat

patch. Jay Whitney or David Asheim can be reached (harassed) at

415/328-6200

Puri-Blend: 800/886-3234

Sampson Health Products: E-mail: [email protected]. Snail mail: 901

Rhode Rd., Kyle, Texas 78640. yeah.com. Call 512/376-2537

anytime to speak to an operator, leave message, or automated fax.

Testing Expert Witness: Good for legal cases. 615/579-5425

Zydot Unlimited, Inc.: 800/725-2481


Drug testing consultants on the net:

[email protected]: These people are looking to answer tough questions.

They say if they don't know an answer, they'll research it for you.

Drug testing mailing list: E-mail <[email protected]> with

"subscribe urine-test Firstname Lastname" as the body. Nicholas Merrill

maintains the mailing list as well as a WEB page saturated with information

and links. http://www.calyx.com/urine-test.html.

Sites and Internet sources:

A list of sites relating to drug testing.

http://www.csun.edu/~hbcsc096/dt

Other drug testing sites:

htrac.com

http://hyperreal.com/drugs/politics/drug.testing

http://www-unix.oit.umass.edu/~verdant/whizquiz

http://www.en.utexas.edu/~babydoll/c...udents/finals/

drupublic_html

http://www.foobar.uk/users/ukcia/piss.html

http://www.foobar.co.uk/users/ukcia/piss.html

http://www.ksu.edu/~floersh/drugs/test/test.html

http://www.pantless.com/~pdxnorml

GO.com - Official Home Page

http://www1.jis.net/~deadhead/test.html

CALC_THC.EXE:

http://www.csun.edu/~hbcsc096/dt/calc_thc.exe

gopher://gopher.well.sf.ca.us:70/00/Politics/piss.list

http://www.calyx.com/urine/piss-list.txt

Drug testing sites to avoid:

These sites may contain a lot of useful information, but they also contain enough misinformation to cause harm.

Cannabis Action Network: This is an extreme case of misinformation.

*AVOID*http://www1.jis.net/%7Edeadhead/pisstest.html

High Times: Some correct information can be found here, but there is

too much misinformation for me to endorse it.

*AVOID*http://www.hightimes.com/~hightimes/ht/tow/tes

Newsgroups:

Newsgroups of interest.

alt.activism

misc.activism.progressive

alt.drugs

rec.drugs.cannabis

alt.drugs.culture

rec.drugs.misc

alt.drugs.pot

rec.drugs.psychedelics

talk.politics.drugs

alt.privacy

sci.techniques.testing.misc

Note: I found this fantastic and useful information on the internet. This was very informative and I thought it belonged on our newsletter. A person byt the initials of J.G. found the information. I want to give credit where credit is due. There was no money made on the distribution of this newsletter. I would also like to thank Hulkster for providing the info.


Tren is God, I am he
   
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Section III -- Supplements/Herbs
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Section III -- Supplements/Herbs - 02-10-2012, 11:22 PM

Part 1

Valerian Root

(valeriana officinalis)

Other Names: Capon's Tail, English Valerian

General Description: The Valerian is a tall perennial herb, native to Europe.

Parts Used: The root and rhizome

Active Ingredients: Valeric acid or valerenic acid.

Traditional Uses: Valerian was known to Dioscorides ( A.D. 41-68 ), in ancient Rome and

has been used since that time as a mild sedative.

Current Status: Valerian is used extensively in Europe as a mild sleep aid and for anxiety. Several

clinical studies on humans have shown it to safely relieve occasional insomnia.

Precautions: Valerian is generally recognized as safe and approved for food use by the U.S.F.D.A.


Most known for its sedative effect on the central nervous system. It is used for anxiety, nervous tension, insomnia, and general stress symptoms. Although it is a strong nervine, it leaves the person feeling refreshed rather than sluggish, in most cases; however, some people report that the use of Valerian causes bad dreams and grogginess. Another study shows Valerian to act as

a sedative for the agitated and as a stimulant for the fatigued. Valerian can be used for the eyesight if it is weakened by a lack of energy in the optic nerve. It has some influence on the heart and circulation, as it increases the force of the heart and yet slows it down; thus, being used for cardiac palpitations. Other uses include: hysteria, menstrual cramps, muscle spasms, to promote menstruation, hypochondria, neuralgic pains, St. Vitus' Dance (a convulsive nervous disorder), flatulence, muscle spasms, spastic and irritable bowel, nervous dyspepsia, stomach cramps, fever,

colds, heartburn, hangover, arthritis, acne, ulcers, dandruff, and pain. CAUTION: Should only be used short term and in normal doses; otherwise, it may cause headaches, muscular spasm and palpitations, and mental depression in some individuals. It is NOT for everyone and tends to be

overused because of its success with certain individuals. The fresh root tincture seems to accomodate more types of people.

Section IV -- "Personal Page" : Bodybuilders experiences.

This is a section that contains personal insights and thoughts of your fellow bodybuilders, friends on the Message boards, etc. You may identify with some of the thoughts, stories, insights. This is an open forum for anyone to write in. If you have something that you would like to share that you think others may enjoy, or could learn from, please write in. All participation is welcome!

Part 1

To Tattoo or Not to Tattoo? That is the Question....


As a young teen, I wanted a tattoo. Back then I was not old enough, and as my later teen years I dated girls that looked down on them. So to please them, I refrained. Now Im married and into bodybuilding. The other weekend, I was looking at people that are working out in the gym. And I noticed that most of the bigger bodybuilders were sporting a tattoo. My workout partner has 2 of them. I think that more and more of the bodybuilders out there are heading in that direction, including myself. Im getting my first one next week. I hope I dont cry! Ha Ha. Anyway, I talked with a bunch of people and decided to seriously consider it. The biggest problem I faced, was everyone has an opinion on it. So I decided to ask the people in the business. Afterall, I will have to live with this for the rest of my life, so I want it to look good. I have seen some shitty tattoos in my life, and would not want to have one, so I did some homework and Im passing it on to you. So if you ever decide to seriously think about it, read this and I hope it makes the decision for you easier.



HISTORY

Today there seems to be a lot of attraction to body art. What's the attraction? Tattooing and piercing are two of the oldest and most creative forms of artistic expression known to man. The literal meaning of the word tattoo may be enough to ward off those interested in using their bodies as forms of art. Tattoo is derived from the Tahitian word tatay, meaning 'to inflict wounds.' Tattooing can be dated back as far as 8000 B.C. and has been popular among most cultures. Throughout all time tattoos have represented different things to different people. Ancient Greeks and Romans used tattoos to signify slaves and criminals. In the past, tattoos were used as a sign of honor and new status in the Marquesas Islands. In New Guinea tattoos on women were regarded as a sign of beauty.

Today in the Western world tattoos are used to gain membership into a particular group, or to change social status. They are also used to express patriotism, devotion to loved ones, or religious preferences.

Tattoo Today

According to tattoo artists in the business, tattoos have changed in the last eight

years. In the past, tattoos were done with brush line patterns which left them looking flat and lifeless. As one tattoo artist says, "We are now doing tattoos that are more detailed with more shading that produces a 3-D effect. The brighter colors also last longer. Tattooing has snowballed in the last three and a half years."

The tattoo artist who asked not too be mentioned on this newsletter has three tribal tattoos, one of which the artist drew themself. "Tattooing and piercing is an Ancient ritual that has its foundations in who you are, and it becomes a form of self expression." It was believed that the tattoo is supposed to help prevent injury. I don't think that is why people get them, but maybe some people believe it works.

For some, tattoos are not well thought out before they are gotten and are soon regretted.

"A lot of people get cheesy tattoos without the realization that it is there for life, and should be a reflection of their personalities," states the tattoo artist. So, if you conteplate getting a tattoo, please think long and hard about it, because a tattoo can cost in the range of around a $100. An inch to get rid off. One Cosmetic Surgery Consultant reports that they perform around 120 tattoo removals each year. When asked why people want the tatto removed, they claim that the most popular reason is because they are unwanted. "There are a variety of reasons for this, parents wanting to get rid of children's tattoos, people who have gotten tattoos when they are younger and are now entering into professional life, embarrassment, and also people who have gotten satanic tattoos and then changed their ideals."



Tattoo Inspiration

If you are looking for a "certain something", or just inspiration, turn to the following sources for help: clip art books, childrens coloring books (the hard outlines translate easily into tattoos), stained glass or embroidery pattern books. Other sources require a little more talent and skill to convert into tattoos, but can be the best way to get direction toward a unique tattoo: brochures from travel agencies, product pamphlets, comic books, gaming cards, greeting cards, fabric prints, and, of course, tattoo magazines.

Over the years we have created tattoos using a very strange collection of sources, including: coffee cups, collectors plates, figurines and statuary, stained glass items, belt buckles, jewelry, photos, magazines, bumper stickers, tee shirts, a bed sheet, wallpaper, paper towels, package wrappers, calendars, plants, wrapping paper and posters, to name just a few.

Use your imagaination and start looking at everything you see with an eye towards a tattoo...





The 10 Commandments Of Tattoo Care

1. Thou Shalt Not Listen To Anyone Else Regarding Tattoo Care.

2. Thou Shalt Not Remove Bandage From Thy Tattoo Sooner Than 2 Hours Or No Later Than 10 Hours. (Even To Show Friends)

3. Thou Shalt Wash Thy Tattoo Immediately Upon Removal Of Bandage With Warm Water, Mild Soap, Pat Dry, Do Not Re-bandage.

4. Thou Shalt Wash Thy Tattoo 5 To 7 Times A Day For The First 3 Days.

5. After 3 Days, Thou Shalt Apply A Dab Of Hand cream Or Light Lotion. (No Vaseline)

6. Thou Shalt Not Soak Thy Tattoo (Quick Shower Only) For 2 Weeks.

7. Thou Shalt Avoid Swimming Pools, Saunas, Steam Rooms, Lakes, and Salt Water For 2 Weeks.

8. Thou Shalt Not Pick, Scratch, Or Scrub Tattoo For Six Weeks.

9. Thou Shalt Not Wear Pantyhose Or Nylon Apparel On Tattoo For 10 Days.

10. Thou Shalt Wear Sun block On Thy Tattoo For The Rest Of Thy Days.



Frequently Asked Questions on the subject of Tattoos

While bodyart has been around for thousands of years, it is currently experiencing an almost unprecedented popularity in the US and in Europe. However, the general population of developed countries still regard it with some disdain, especially against those who have *A LOT* of any type

bodyart. The purpose of this FAQ is *not* to raise these issues or to change such views, but to educate those who are interested in learning more about tattoos. Regardless of motive, tattooing is a very personal choice. Information in this FAQ should help you make a wiser decision about getting inked, since the reversing process is not easy.





Q: DOES IT HURT?

This is the first question in this FAQ because it's usually the first question that people ask. The answer is yes. Having needles pierce your skin *does* hurt. But what you *really* want to know is, "How MUCH does it hurt, and can I handle it?" It's not nearly as bad as what you might imagine. The pain comes from the cluster of needles on the tattooing machine piercing your skin very

rapidly. This sensation, however, doesn't feel like the poking pain of an injection--it's more of a constant vibration. You will be amazed at how quickly your body releases endorphins, (pain killers), which dullens the pain significantly. The pain will also vary according to where on your body you get worked on. Skin right above bones (collarbone, anklebone, etc.) tend to be more painful than other areas. In addition, certain types of needles seem to hurt more than others. I personally think the needles used for outlining produce a sharper, more noticeable pain, while the needles used for

shading seem to be much more like an electrical buzz (nearly painless).

Remember, you are volunteering for the experience. The amount of pain will depend on your psychological attitude.



NOTE: Do not drink alcohol or take illegal drugs for pain relief purposes prior to your tattoo sessions. Both aspirin and alcohol thin your blood and promote excessive bleeding. Aspirin also decreases the clotting of blood, which will slow down your healing as well. In addition, artists do not appreciate dealing with drunks and is illegal in many states.

Q: SHOULD I GET A TATTOO IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Your reading this may mean you're already interested in getting a tattoo, or may know someone who is. In a survey of 163 tattooed men and women, a third of them had regretted their tattoos! While most of this FAQ discusses the process once you've decided to get one, let's pause

for a moment.



Q: *WHY* DO I WANT ONE?

People get tattoos for different reasons. Is it to please your partner? Is it because you want to belong to a group that has tattoos? Do you identify with a certain subculture known for tattoos? Do you want to show your independence, individuality or uniqueness?

These are all valid reasons, and why many people get tattooed. However, because of the permanency of your tattoo, try to look at yourself in five, 10, or even 20 years. What will you be doing at that time? You might be a free-spirited college student now, and a web of vines on your

wrist would look really lovely. However, are you planning to work in a very conservative field after you graduate? Will others look at your tattoo in a bad way? Will you have to hide it with long sleeve shirts? Are you *willing* to wear long sleeve shirts if the environment is negative?

Do you want a tattoo of a tiger because your partner's nickname is "Tiger," and you love the way s/he scratches your skin? Do you think you'll be with this person in five years? If not, how will you look at that tattoo? With fond memories, symbolizing a special period in your life? Or a shameful or painful reminder of somebody who hurt you and didn't care for you?

You're a headbanger (or a nose-smasher, ear-bopper or whatever) and you *REALLY* want a tattoo all over your arms just like Axl Rose, but you can't afford a professional artist so you get your friend with the mail-order tattooing machine to do those designs for you? Or perhaps you

get spider webs tattooed all over your hands (or your face, which has happened) because you want to be "different" in school. What if you decide to "straighten out" and get a real job; train as a chef or something, and then no restaurant hires you?

GETTING IT REMOVED is NOT easy, and is NOT cheap. Expect to pay $1,000 to remove even a fairly small-sized tattoo if you're looking at laser surgery. Expect to have a noticeable ugly scar if you go with a non-laser technique. Expect to pay for every penny out of your own

pocket because health insurance companies will not pay for tattoo removal. There may not be a laser surgery specialist in your area. Then think of all those laser-surgery doctors who are going to get rich off of a person's foolishness or lack of careful thinking.

...Maybe tattooing isn't for you.

...Maybe you shouldn't get that $10 tattoo your friend's been telling you he'll give you, in his garage.

...Maybe you shouldn't let your buddies tattoo your hand with India Ink and a needle at this weekend's party.

...Maybe you should get a tattoo on your back instead of on your hand.

...Maybe you should get a tattoo on your left wrist so it can be covered by your watch if you have to.

...And maybe after reading this FAQ and reading RAB, you'll think carefully about it, and make some informed, wise decisions about what to do with your body.

*Tattooing can be beautiful.*

*Tattooing can be exhilarating.*

*Tattooing can open a whole new world for you.*

...but make sure to do it *RIGHT*.

RELIGIOUS (CHRISTIAN) ARGUMENTS

Written by: Chris Wayne





A word to the religious: In Leviticus 19:28, it says not to tattoo "I am the Lord" on you (i.e. don't take the name of the Lord in vain). It does NOT say you can't mark yourself at all, and it does NOT say there's anything wrong about piercing. What it DOES say is that it prohibits mutilating yourself for the dead, which was a senseless practice at that time. But for Christians, they are no longer bound by the Law. Remember that it's not what you do; it's what's in your heart when you do it. The

Talmud even mentions that it's not the tattooing that is wrong, but what the tattoo is of (i.e. if the tattoo is an image of a 'false god' as opposed to just a 'design').

There are probably many 'prim & proper' Christians out there that have had the urge to be tattooed, but have repressed it because they believed it was a sin. Well, if you really believe that it is a sin, then it is. But is getting tattooed really a sin? If it draws you away from Christ or causes someone else to stumble, then yes. But tattooing isn't any more special than anything else we distract ourselves with.

Take things in moderation at your speed. We are to deny ourselves of things if they cause us to lose sight of Jesus (for some, it could be driving a car, getting married, having children, going to work, smoking, abusing drugs & alcohol, disrespect, etc.). If you have good discernment, you know what distracts you from Christ and what doesn't.

Tattooing isn't inherently evil; it got it's 'evil' status because GOD-less heathens from places like the South Pacific were tattooed. Do what pleases GOD; and one thing that pleases GOD is to be confident in oneself (not overly prideful, but confidence tempered with discernment, almost bordering on arrogance). Tattooing can bring out that confidence, because to be tattooed requires commitment. And that's a conquering power over fear and old ruts. GOD wants mature dynamic individuals that fear him to fellowship with, not people cowering in fear from some rigid set of laws. Note: fear of GOD is totally different from cowering in fear.

Some Christians will claim that drinking any amount of alcohol is sinful, but the medical community is saying that 2-3 drinks a day is good for the heart. Drink responsibly. So, for those that have repressed getting a tattoo because of family or religious upbringing, just do it. If it's not for you, fine--but don't ruin it for the others.

Tattooing in no way marks who's saved and who's not. If you've seen the trilogy "A Distant Thunder," the Mark of the Beast was tattooed on your right hand or forehead. The tattoo was 666 in binary '6's (i.e. 1 0 11 0 11 0 1 Sort of like a UPC code), but this doesn't mean that every tattoo

is a Mark of the Beast. People have stated that the credit card and the computer were tools of

the Devil. So what? Everybody depends on both today, even if the Anti-Christ is to use the computer to control the population, it doesn't mean that if you use a computer, you're a follower of the Devil.

I believe that religion, when improperly used, is a dangerous thing. Christianity has wasted a lot of valuable time trying to influence people in believing that unimportant things are evil instead of

spreading the word of GOD. Christianity (or those prideful, arrogant, self righteous leaders) has looked down on tattooing far too long.



A TEMPORARY ALTERNATIVE?

For those who might not be ready for the plunge, but are seriously considering what it would look/feel like to have a tattoo, Julian ([email protected]) recommends a particular type of temporary tattoo that uses very light Japanese rice paper. He says these are of very high quality, and last about two weeks WITH CARE. I have had the phone number confirmed recently so they are still in business.

Don Ling's Removable Tattoos & Fantoos, 507/956-2024

P.O.Box 309 Butterfield, MN 56120

or 102 2nd ST. South Butterfield, MN 56120

FLASH NEWS This is a new update as of 2/96: It turns out Don Ling actually only began carrying these rice paper tattoos this year. The bulk of his merchandise are "decal tattoos." This according to Roy of Temptu <[email protected]>, the company that owns the rights to the rice

paper tattoos. The following is from Roy himself:

The rice paper temporary tattoo you...mention is made in New York by Temptu studios. It is a cosmetic ink printed on an archival cigarette-like tissue paper. Special cosmetic inks are then used to paint in the 'tattoo.' The result is totally realistic, waterproof, and longlasting (yep, up to 2 weeks!)

"This process was used in the popular movies such as "Cape Fear" on Robert de Niro, "Once Were Warriors", "From Dusk til Dawn" on George Clooney and currently on Sean Penn at the end of "Dead Man Walking". Also see Bruce Willis' Head in "The 12 Monkeys". It was invented by Dr. S. Zuckerman for the film "Tattoo", (Bruce Dern/Maude Adams) in 1981.

Temporary Tattoos are used for someone who wants to 'test drive a tattoo,' so they can decide on position, color, before deciding what and where.

For some, the easiest thing to do is to simply draw on the skin with a non-toxic marker. In fact, many people who already have tattoos do this to figure out placement and design. If you want it to wash off right away, use something temporary. Crayola's washable markers work well. If you want to see if you can live with a design for a couple of days, try a permanent marker such as the "Sharpies". They come in basic colors.

Part of the process of getting a tattoo is coming to terms with its permanency. It's like losing your virginity. You lose it once, and you can't get it back. You can neck and make out, but it's not intercourse. If you're afraid of losing your virginity, you have to come to terms with THAT before you can have sex. But once you lose your virginity, you forget all about how you feared its loss, and simply enjoy having sex!

Debunking of urban folklore

Someone asked to confirm a rumour about the possibility of temporary tattoos obtainable by using a tattooing machine very shallowly on the skin, to have the tattoo last only six months or so.

Several professional tattoo artists replied with a very strong NO. There is no way to be able to prevent the needles from entering the second layer of skin (the dermis), where tattoo inks normally go. Further, even if the tattoo machine only enters the top layer of skin (the epidermis), you will end up with too much scarring that the tattoo will never really go away. Considering the time, cost and pain factors, this is not an option--and no professional tattoo artist will want to experiment on you.

A proprietor claimed a "new discovery!" of a temporary tattoo that was removable after a couple of years. All efforts by various reviewers and professionals to confirm the validity of this product have been unsuccessful--this product, whatever it is being touted as, is not endorsable.

THE DECISION PROCESS--MAKING THE BIG PLUNGE: WHERE CAN I FIND A GOOD ARTIST,

AND WHAT SHOULD I LOOK FOR IN A TATTOO ARTIST?

The bane of the tattoo world is the shadowy, unprofessional person called the "scratcher." A scratcher is somebody who:

--Does not have the proper training in either tattoo art or of running a professional operation;

--Does not know and/or care to use responsible sterilization methods;

--Promises to provide tattooing services for an incredibly low fee, for free, or in exchange for drugs;

--Chooses not to apprentice through a legitimate tattoo shop because of one excuse or another (but lacks the knowledge one needs to work in or run a professional shop);

--Will hurt you because they don't know what they're doing;

--Will give you a permanent tattoo you will regret for the rest of your life;

--You should stay away with a ten-foot pole.

Never, never, never get work from a scratcher unless you are willing to accept all the hazards listed above.

Of those in a study who regretted their tattoos, more than two-thirds of them regretted their tattoo because of poor quality! Looking for an artist can be as easy as checking the Yellow Pages, or as

complex as checking references, magazine photos, and reading. There are a number of ways to find good artists, including (but certainly not limited to):

--Perusing tattoo magazines. While not all tattoo magazines are of the National Geographic quality, the photos will speak for themselves. Some issues highlight specific artists' works; a good way see the type of work someone does. Use the photos in the magazines to compare with those of the artist you are interested in. These magazines have done a lot to show what is *possible*.

Some things to look for in magazines:

-Style (realistic, black & grey work, tribal, etc.)

-Placement on your body

-Ideas for images

-Size in proportion to your body

-Artists whose work you like.

--Attending a tattoo convention.

You can approach this one of two ways. You can either go to a shop because someone recommended the artist to you, or you can go in cold. For obvious reasons, you will have a little more information with you if you already know something about the artist. This may make you feel more at ease when going into a shop for the first time. While hunting down the place you want to obtain your tattoo consider the following:

-- Choose an experienced, knowledgeable performer who knows about sterilization and avoidance of infection.

-- Gives advice and proper care in order to avoid infection during the healing process.

With both of those bases covered, healing of either should be non-eventful and the desired appearance should be guaranteed.



WHAT KIND OF DESIGN SHOULD I GET?

What images do you think of when you think of a tattoo? Do you think of anchors, of roses or of skulls? While these traditional images are still available, you will be pleasantly surprised at the variety you will find today.

There are two basic types of tattoos: Flash, and custom. As you can imagine, "custom" means you have a design you like that you take in with you. "Flash" is the stock designs you see on the walls of the shop. The main thing to remember is that you're not required to choose from the selection of flash in a shop--You're NOT limited to just an anchor, a rose or a skull. Remember however, that these smaller pieces of pre-priced flash are the bread & butter of many shops, since they are

proportionately expensive ($75 for 20 minutes' work, for example where an artist might charge $100 an hour for custom work). Also, the number of customers who lay out the big bucks for large, elaborate custom pieces is too small to keep a regular shop in business.

A few of the major styles of tattooing:

--BIO-MECHANICAL: A style popularized by illustrator H.R. Giger, who designed the creature from the "Alien" movies. Bio-mechanical work usually involves an anatomical flesh intertwined with some technical drawings of machines. A close relative of this style involves just the biological look of flesh without the mechanical parts.

--BLACK & GREY: Refers to the colors used, this style requires the artist to have advanced shading techniques for subtlety.

--CELTIC: Beautiful, intricate knotwork of the Celts (a hard "k", NOT a soft "c" like the basketball team). These are much harder for artists to do, and is best done by someone who specializes in it. Also usually done in just black ink.

--ORIENTAL: Big, bold pieces of Oriental images (carp, clouds, dragons, etc.) based on the Ukiyo-e woodblock prints of 18th Century Edo-period Japan. Note: It is fine to call this "Oriental" and not "Asian," because it references an object and not a person.

--PORTRAIT: Images taken from photos, best done by someone who can render realistic photographic images. Usually done in black and grey ink.

--SAILOR JERRY: Traditional sailor tattoo style made famous by Jerry Collins in Honolulu.

--TRIBAL: Usually bold simple lines, simple patterns. Almost always done with just black ink. If you have seen the bands around the arms of some bodybuilders, (ie, Barbed wire, Vines, etc.) That is considered tribal.

With a good artist working for you, you can get practically any image you'd like. Accomplished artists can render portraits, wildlife, psychedelic and biomechanical styles with impressive results. Your main challenge is to find the artist who can best do the design YOU want.

WHAT KIND OF COLORS CAN I GET?

Concerned that you'll end up with a greenish tattoo with little bits of red or yellow? Worry no more! Today's inks run the entire gamut--and it would not be terribly sarcastic to take a Pantone color chart with you! Most tattoo inks are metal salt-based pigments that are not made specifically to be used under the skin, and have not been approved by the FDA for this purpose. The idea is that for most people, these pigments are inert and cause no problems. Some people have been known to

have allergic reactions; any reputable artist should be willing to provide you with a small "patch test" of the colors you desire. This is required in the state of Arkansas.

Experts say that some artists use acrylic-based pigments, which he feels may be more troublesome than the metal-based pigments for some with sensitive skin. Best to ask your

artist first.



HOW TO LOOK AROUND IN THE SHOP

Don't let the shop intimidate you when you first walk in. For the uninked, a tattoo shop is intimidating enough. Strange smells, strange sounds. Some shops even try to look intimidating to create a tough-guy feel. Just keep in mind that you're a potential customer. Consider it window shopping.

The first thing you should do is to take a minute to look around. Chances are, you'll encounter some flash (stock illustrations) stapled on the walls. These will most likely lean toward the traditional. Skull and crossbones, roses and the like. You might also see some signs ("No minors; we ID," "We have sanitary conditions" etc.). These signs will also be indicators of the personality of the shop owner. If the signs seem overly intimidating, patronizing or snobbish, they can be tip-offs of the shop's attitude. Some are very friendly, with plants, aquarium fish, and signs like "Tattooed people come in all colors."

Note: There is no national law regarding the legal age for tattooing.

Check with the shop to find out what the local statute regulates.



ASKING TO SEE THEIR PORTFOLIO

Do NOT be impressed by the flash on the wall. These illustrations are usually purchased from other artists and do not represent the work of your artist. Frankly, anyone with some experience can easily trace the outlines of these illustrations and fill in the colors. What you really need to look at is a book that contains a collection of photos of the artist's work. Go to the counter and ask to see one. If they tell you they don't have one, walk out immediately. You're visiting the shop to

commission a piece of art to be permanently illustrated on your skin; for the artist to tell you s/he doesn't have samples in a portfolio is insulting.

WHAT TO LOOK FOR IN THEIR PORTFOLIO

When you do look in their portfolio, there are a few things to keep in mind. Do you see any photos of pieces that you recognize in the flash (on the wall, or in a flash book)? If so, how is it rendered in tattoo format? Before anything else, check to see that the lines are clean. Are they well-defined? Straight where they should be; not shaky or blurry? Are the borders all uniform in width? Do the colors seem true? Are they bright? Proportionately correct? Look at the people in the book. This can be an indicator of the clientele in the shop (besides looking at the ambiance of the shop). Is

there a fair mix of women and men in the book? Are they all sporting "biker" tats, or any one particular genre/style?

Again, keep in mind that anyone can stencil an outline of an illustration onto your skin. The skill in the artistry comes in the shading, use of colors and other subtle things that set an artist apart

from a simple tattooist.

Do you see anything in the portfolio that is not in the flash? These are the custom pieces that the artists have done, and they should be their crowning glory. How do they look? Do you like what you see? If there is more than one artist working in the shop, and you see some photos you like, make sure to find out which artist did the work.

WHAT KINDS OF QUESTIONS TO ASK

Whenever you ask to see their collection of photos, the person in the shop will hopefully immediately recognize you as someone who knows a little more about tattoos--at least enough not to be satisfied by looking at just the flash. If the shop is not too busy or if the artist

is not in the middle of working, they might stand on the other side of the counter to have a conversation with you. This is a wonderful opportunity to ask questions of the artist.

Some reasonable questions to ask in your conversation that shouldn't take too much time for the artist to answer:

What is their favorite style?

If what *you* are looking to get done happens to be their specialty you are in luck; be it tribal, wildlife or whatever.

Is there any one particular subject they like to do?

One artist, without hesitation, told me his favorite was skulls. I would've jumped for joy had that been what I wanted.

How long has the shop been here?

This may be an indicator of the stability of their business. The tat industry in itself fluctuates, but continuity implies business acumen, responsible practices and that they are not a fly-by-night operation.

How long have they been at the shop?

The shop may have been there for 20 years, but the artist may only have been there for a couple of months. If they have been there for what you consider a short period, ask them where they were before.

How long have they been tattooing?

It might not matter so much that the artist has only been there for a short while, if they've been tattooing for several years. They might come from various backgrounds--anywhere from working on friends to having a fine arts degree. This type of information will give you more insight into the artist's attitude as well as aptitude.

Do they get to do much custom work?

This may depend on where the shop is located, but it also depends on how good of an artist they are, and whether they have their own style for which they are known for.

It is often difficult for new artists to break into the business, and an apprenticeship is often a very good way to learn not only about tattooing itself, but also about the day-to-day operation of a small

business. For artists to take apprenticeships means they're interested in expanding the artform, in giving a new person a break (so to speak) and feeling confident enough about their own skills that they feel they can offer some insight and experience for the new person. This again goes back to the attitude of the artist and the shop. Don't let the looks of the artist intimidate you. Tattoo artists usually have a lot of tattoos themselves. In fact, I would be somewhat leery of an artist who has NO tattoos at all. The main thing is that you need to talk with them and get a feel for what they are like. As you talk with the artist and build a rapport, if you feel comfortable you may want to broach the subject of what you're interested in getting done. Bounce your idea off with the artist and see what they are willing to help you with. Remember however, that the artist is running a professional business! Be polite--don't linger and overspend your welcome if you don't plan on getting any work done at all.

[Note: Don't base your decision according to what tattoos you see on the artist--they were not done by that person!]

WHAT SORTS OF THINGS TO LOOK FOR IN A SHOP

Looking critically at the shop is as important as choosing your artist. Make sure the place is very clean, make sure the artist uses disposable, single-use needles (that are not re-used after one client), and uses an autoclave for all other equipment. Don't be afraid to ask them, either.

A legitimate artist will be glad to show you. What does the shop look like? What is its ambiance? Does it look like a barber shop, a hair salon, dental office or an art gallery? If you are a

nonsmoker, will cigarette smoke bother you? Look for used ashtrays as signs. Do the work areas offer you any privacy? Do they use shower curtains, private booths or shoulder-high room dividers?

Try to go and visit and then come back another day. Don't feel pressured into having to get one right then and there. Try and talk to some people that have experience with the artist (and not the groupies that you'll find hanging around the shop). You should feel comfortable with the artist and you should like him/her. If you don't, then don't get a tattoo. Make sure the artist is willing to listen to you and respects what you want. Don't go to an artist that has an agenda of what he/she wants to do. The artist may make suggestions, but the final word is always yours.

Finally, make sure you take their business card with you. If the artist you talk to does not have his/her own card, jot down the name on the back, and perhaps some notes to yourself about the shop and the artist.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T: WHAT TO ASK FROM ARTISTS?

It has been brought to my attention that some tattooists have an attitude problem when it comes to potential customers. Tattooists (and piercers!) need to realize that not every person who walks in has to look like a grunged-out leather-wearing biker, or a raven-haired cleopatra-eyed septum-pierced zombie. People from all walks of life may be interested in bodyart. A potential customer should NOT be made to feel out-of-place or ashamed for walking in wearing a business suit, or an LL Bean dress. It is amazing to think that someone with purple hair and eyebrow rings

could actually discriminate against someone, but apparently, this seems to be happening. Just as a customer should expect certain sanitation standards, they should also expect an inviting atmosphere.

ARE TATTOO SHOPS INSURED?

Most reputable tattoo shops are insured. The problem is, they're usually insured against premises liability. This means that they have insurance coverage if you fall and hit your head on their floor, but NOT if you're unhappy with their work. In the past, the only insurer who would cover the latter was Lloyd's of London, and their rates were apparently very high. This has changed recently, with the availability of a comprehensive insurance package available from one agent based on the West Coast. Many shops do have some form of insurance (this may be a requirement in their rental lease). Just keep in mind that the insurance does not necessarily cover QUALITY.

HOW MUCH DOES IT COST TO GET A TATTOO?

This is an age-old debate, so the following is just a very basic ballpark. You usually pay for work either by the piece, or by the hour. The smaller pieces in the artist's flash book are "standard stock" material that usually don't take the artist too long to do. For these, you might find prices listed right next to the artwork. The artist may have a "minimum" charge that might vary with each artist.

Larger (or custom) pieces will usually be charged by the hour (unless you and the artist decide beforehand on the total price). If you get a "stock" piece (probably about 2" x 2" in size), you will probably not pay more than $100 and sit no longer than an hour in the chair. Your mileage may vary.

If you bring your own design, the artist may charge anywhere from $50 to a few hundred dollars an hour, depending on the artist. However, you may want to work with someone who charges $100 or so an hour; after all, you DO get what you pay for. Also, some artists charge for illustration time

prior to beginning tattoo work. If they do, this might increase your price by an extra hour. If they tell you that your piece will be charged by the hour, ask them how many hours they think it'll take. If you are on a limited budget, tell them how much you can afford.

Price negotiation should be up front and straightforward, a part of your initial discussion before work begins. Some shops take credit cards; most don't. Out-of-towners may be asked to put down a deposit. Be particularly wary of people willing to work "for cheap" or "for free." They are often artists just starting out, who are still developing their skills. Caveat emptor.

Warning: Once the artist quotes you a price, DON'T DICKER WITH IT! The best way to get on the artist's bad side is to try to bargain with the price. If you think the price is too high, renegotiate the scope of the artwork--NOT the price. I usually do it this way: "Hi, I have X amount I can spend on this design. What can we work out for that price?"

If you are very pleased with their work and service, you are strongly encouraged to tip the artist, even if they own the shop. Even shop owners don't pocket 100% of what they make (remember--it's a business!). Tips can range from 10% to 20% of the piece, so be prepared with cash on hand.

I personally recommend a tip for any work which you are pleased with, or any custom work where the artist spent time drawing up your illustration (since drawing time is usually not included in your price). Nothing brightens up a day for the artist, or helps to build a friendly relationship with your artist more than a generous tip. If you're very happy with the artist and you think you might get more work from them later, TIP!!

There have been heated discussions in the past regarding the appropriateness of tipping a shop OWNER. If you feel that an owner does not deserve a tip on top of the price s/he charges you,

then A) do not give a tip at all, or B) bring some sort of offering, be it food, flowers or whatever.

Many tattoo artists have told me that the BEST TIP is good word of mouth. If you are happy with your tattoo, show it off to your friends and tell them where you got it done!



HOW SHOULD I ACT WHEN I GET IN THAT CHAIR?

Once you have settled on a design and a price that you and your artist agree on, the work will either begin right then, or you will be asked to come back for a later appointment (e.g. if the artist has another client coming in in 15 minutes). Once you're in that chair, what can you expect? Most likely, the artist will begin the long process of preparing for your work. This is especially true if the artist is going to do a custom design that you brought in. First, the design will have to be worked on. Most artists will play around with the design on paper first, although some artists will do it freehand. "Freehand" means the artist takes an ink pen to hand and begins drawing a design on your skin without the use of a stencil (NOT where the artist begins work with the tattooing machine

immediately--the artist, no matter how good, still needs to envision how the work will look on your skin--proportion, placement, etc.). When you and the artist are happy with the design, the artist might outline the design with a piece of carbon paper, or use an old-fashioned copy machine to get a working copy of it. This would be when the artist would properly size the design. The artist will then clean your skin where the work will be done (probably an alcohol or antiseptic rub), and

will swipe your skin with an "adhesive," which is usually Speed Stick deodorant. The artist will then put the carbon side of the design directly on your skin. When the paper is lifted, ta-da! A carbon line drawing of the design should appear on your skin!

The artist will probably let you look in a mirror to make sure you are happy with the design and the placement. Once this is agreed upon, the artist will then begin putting the supplies out.

At this point, your artist should be doing things like dispensing various colors of ink into little disposable wells, and rigging a new set of needles into the tattoo machine. At this time, you will probably try to look cool by looking around the studio walls or occasionally looking to see what your artist is doing. Your artist might have a radio playing, which will help distract you a little.

At this point, it is best for you to try and relax. You can ask the artists about some things, like the colors of the ink. Depending on the work you are getting, the artist will need to mix some colors, for

example. You're probably somewhat nervous, but excited at the same time because you're actually gonna get a real tattoo! Whether you realize it or not, your body is going through quite an adrenalin rush. Try to remain calm and not too anxious. Your hyped-up condition and your anxiety about the anticipated pain of your experience by themselves may trigger a fainting spell. It will help if you are not there on an empty stomach. Get a bite to eat about an hour or two before you go in for

your session. Having hard candy or some juice on hand during the session is also recommended.

Just relax and try to stay calm. For women, the experience of anxious anticipation is similar to a pelvic exam at an OB/GYN, where you are more nervous about it while waiting for the doctor as you lie prone on the examining table, feet in the stirrups. Just as most exams aren't painful or really all that bad, neither is tattooing.

Bzzzzzttttt....The artist starts up the machine, dips the needle into the ink and starts to work toward your skin! Aaaaaahhhhh!!! Will it hurt? Will it hurt? Grit your teeth! Hang tight!...

Ooohhhhhhh! It does hurt! Ow! Ow! Ow! I'm okay, I'm okay, this is fine, it's not that bad. I can grit my teeth. Grit, grit, grit. Try to smile a bit. My teeth are gritting, anyway. Oh, I hope this pain doesn't

stay like this!! Breathe. Don't forget to breathe. Relax. Relax. Relax. Okay there, that's better. Not so painful. I can handle it. Yeah--look at all the tattoos HE's got on his arms. I can handle it, too. Yeah.

...The most painful part of the process will pass in a couple of minutes, after which the area will feel abuzz with electricity and warmth. Just try to relax and breathe deeply--enjoy the one-of-a-kind

experience that you're feeling. Oftentimes, you end up clenching your jaws, grinding your teeth or grasping the chair with your white-knuckled hands. But once you pass the first couple of minutes, you'll feel silly for having worried about it so much. If you still feel uncomfortable after a few minutes, it may be because you're sitting in an uncomfortable position. See if you can get into a more comfortable, reclining position--but make sure to ask the artist first before you try to move.

Some people try to distract themselves by trying to talk with the artist. This is kind of like with hair stylists--some stylists just love to gab and gab (just ask them an open-ended question), while some

stylists would rather concentrate and not screw up your hairdo. Same with tattoo artists. While some will like to "talk story" with you, others would rather concentrate on the work you're paying them to do. After all, their job, income, and reputation are on the line when they have the tattooing machine to your skin. Often, they'll talk during easy parts, and less during complex work. Just go with the flow and not worry about it.

The only thing I don't particularly prefer is if there's a lot of traffic walking around in the studio and the artist has to keep talking to them (either potential clients or tattoo groupies). For this reason,

a cubicle or dividing partition is a nice option for privacy. Most people can sit through over an hour of work, but if you get uncomfortable, just ask your artist if you can take a break. If you feel woozy, you might consider bringing some candy with you to give you a little lift, or some water to drink.

WHERE ON MY BODY SHOULD I GET A TATTOO?

This may seem VERY trivial, since the answer can be "anywhere you please!" The ONLY places you cannot technically get permanent tattoos are your hair, teeth and nails (even the cornea used to be tattooed years ago for medical purposes). Interestingly, women and men tend to get tattoos in different locations. This, according to sociologist Clinton Sanders, is because men and women get tattoos for different reasons. Men, he says, get them to show others, while women get them for

the sake of decorating their body--and often place them where they can't normally be seen, so that it doesn't prompt comments about her "reputation." However for the sake of this FAQ, the following is a short list of areas to get inked. I am included the statistics from Clinton Sanders' study on the body location of the first tattoo for men and women as well (there were 111 men in his survey group and 52 women).

--Head: The "head" here refers mostly to the area where your hair grows. You'll need to shave the area for the tat to be most visible. If you need to hide your tat, you can grow your hair out. Areas more commonly inked are the sides of the head (above the ears), and above the nape of the neck in the back. There are people who have their entire heads inked. I am told that the tattooing process vibrates your skull!

--Sides of neck (nape).

--Back of neck: I've seen some tribal pieces, and bats done on the back of the neck. You'll need to keep your hair short or tied up to keep it visible.

--Face: Various areas possible. Facial tattoos could fall into the cosmetic, prison, or standard categories. Cosmetic would include darkening of eyebrows, eyelining, liplining, etc. Prison tattoos (which are actually in their own category) often include tat of a single tear near the eye to signify time served. Getting a tat on the face is serious business and crosses a portal because people will never look at you the same way. Can we say "Circus," boys & girls?

--Upper chest: One of the standard areas for tattoos for both men and women. Allows lots of flat area in which to get a fairly large piece. One of the areas where you can choose to get symmetrically inked on both sides. (Men: 5%, women: 35%--chest & breast combined)

--Breasts (women): Used to be trendy to get a tiny tat on the breast. Women (particularly larger breasted ones) need to be careful about eventual sagging of the skin in the area. Don't get a tat that will look silly when it starts to stretch (like a round smiley face that'll turn into an oblong frown).

--Nipples: Usually the artist leaves the nipples alone--the omission of ink tends not to be so noticeable. There HAS been work done with tattooing a facsimile of a nipple onto a breast in reconstructive surgery for those who have lost their nipples, tho--for aesthetic and self-esteem purposes.

--Rib cage: Can be rather painful because of all the ribs you work over. However it offers a fairly large area, and can be incorporated into a major back piece, wrapping around toward the front.

--Stomach/Ab***en: Some people choose not to get work done on their stomachs for a couple of reasons. Area is difficult to work on because there's no solid backing to hold the skin down. It is a sensitive area that may feel uncomfortable. The tat may look horrible after your metabolism slows down and you develop a - er-- "beer gut." (Men: Less than 5%, women: 14%)Women should be concerned about the effect of pregnancy on a stomach tattoo.

--Genitals: The matron nurse: "Did you see the patient in #409? His penis has a tattoo that says 'SWAN' on it!" "Oh no it didn't," says the younger nurse. "It said "SASKACHEWAN'!" All kidding aside, people DO get inked in their genital area. However, do consider that there *will* probably be some blurring in the area because of --er-- shall we say, the amount of movement the skin

experiences (kind of like hands)? The topic of whether penises are flaccid or erect during tattooing--some are, some aren't (if so, how one can *maintain* one during the process is a wonder to me). The only female genital tattoo I've seen (inner labia, I think) was in

"Modern Primitives", and it looked rather blurry. Note: Many artists refuse to do genitals. (Men: 0%; women: 5 %)

--Thighs/hips: A popular area for women to get larger pieces (often extending from the hip area). Shows well with a bathing suit but easily concealable in modest shorts. The entire area of skin around your thighs is bigger than your back, so you can get quite a bit of work done. (Men: 3%; women: 10%)

--Calves: Nice area to get a standard size (2" x 2"). However if you have very hairy legs, it may cut down on the visibility somewhat. (Men: 7%; women: 8%. Category simply listed as leg/foot)

--Ankles: Currently trendy. I think you have to have an ankle tat before you can go to the Eileen Ford Agency with your modeling portfolio.) You can either get a spot piece on the inner or outer ankle, or get something that goes around in a band. Vines and other vegetation seem popular (pumpkins, anyone?)

--Feet: I've seen some incredible footwork (pun intended) in some of the tat magazines. Concealable with shoes. Probably don't have as much wear and tear as hands so you might get less blurring and color loss. This however, is the TOPS of your feet. You will have trouble retaining a tattoo on the bottom of your feet.

--Armpits: Usually reserved for those who want to get full coverage around the arm and chest area, & need the armpits filled. Probably not strongly recommended for the highly ticklish.

--Upper arms: One of the most common areas for men, although I have seen some nice work on women as well. If you decide to get a piece done on your upper arm, consider how much sun it's going to get. Will you be able to put sunblock on it regularly? Otherwise, expect some color loss

and blurring. If you want some serious work done and you wanna show it off, you may want to consider getting a "half sleeve"--full tat coverage throughout your upper arm. (Men: 70%; women: 18%. Category simply states arm/hand)

--Inner arms: A more unusual location than the outer upper arm area, this area is often not easily visible. Be careful if your genes are prone to "bat wing" flab, however.

--Forearms: Popeye sported his anchor on his forearm. Probably not as popular as the upper arm but common just the same. You can have your upper arm "sleeve" extend down for a full sleeve. For an example, check out the heavy metal veejay on MTV (who has a nose pierce, BTW).

--Wrists: Janis Joplin had a dainty tat on her wrist...easily concealable with a watch.

--Hands (fingers and palms): Some artists don't do hands because the ink will have a tendency to blur or fade easily. Consider that you probably move your hands the most out of your entire body. A friend of mine had a multi-colored tat on his finger by Ed Hardy (who cringed upon hearing

about where my friend wanted it), that is only several years old and is now barely noticeable. Some people want to substitute their wedding bands with tat bands. Your palm doesn't retain ink well--if you can find an artist who will do it, you can expect it to be a rather basic line, and that it will not last too long. Perhaps just matching tats some place else would be okay?

--Shoulder blades: The back shoulder blade area is another popular spot for women, who can show off the work with a bathing suit or tank top, but cover it up with regular clothes. If this is the case, be particularly careful with sun because you're not gonna be wearing that unless it's warm & sunny. It's a "safe" place--but may get in the way if you decide to commit yourself to a large back piece. (Men: 15%, women: 15%. Category listed as backs/shoulder)

--Back: You can get any part of your back done, or find yourself an artist you really like, and save your money for a "back piece" that encompasses your entire back. Expect to pay several thousand dollars for a full back piece (not to mention many tat sessions).

--Buttocks: Again, beware of potential sagging in the area.

UPDATE

Well its Monday morning and my left arm and the outside part above my right ankle are sore! I got my tattoo. I decided on a Tribal band on my arm and a 2 inch symbol on my lower leg above the ankle. The Tribal band starts at the back of my arm, wraps around the outside and ends just at the peak of my bicep. A lot of people get the bands all the way around the arm, but I though unless I walk with my arms above my head, no one will see it. Therefore I thought it was a waste of ink. I got the idea for the band from a pattern on a T-shirt.

The Tattoo studio was immaculate, the tattoo artist was a great guy. And the price was right. I was amazed on how affordable for me it was. It cost me $200. for both the tattoos. That included his time to draw the tribal pattern. I know some people who have paid $175. for a 3" tattoo! So I think I got a bargain.

Im proud to say, I didnt pass out, cry or freak out! My bro came with me and I recommend that you take someone that you know for support and to help keep your mind off of the pain. Yes it hurts a bit! The outlining is what is the killer. I was ok on the shoulder area, but when he hit the back of my arm and the top of my bicep where the skin was thinner, I started to suck in some air. But like the FAQ said, your endorphins kick in and you start to get used to it. Filling it in is kind of painful but more bearable than the outlining. The one thing the FAQ above doesnt tell you is to wear appropriate clothing. I wore a tank top. Plus it was something I didnt care about. Remember, your dealing with permanant ink. So if any ink accidentally drips or if you bleed, and get it on your clothes, it wont come out. So make sure it is old clothing.

After the tribal band was done, we took a break. He pulled out a folding gourney changed the needles and cleaned up. It was time for the leg tattoo. Im a little tired by now. Remember, this is not a natural act. Your body goes into a catabolic mode because of the assault on your body.

So I washed and dried my foot and ankle, he shaved the part where I wanted it and put the decal on me for the outline. We are ready for the tattoo. Lets go. OUCH----FUCK!!!!! This one hurts! It really depends on the area where you get the tattoo where you will feel more or less pain. Also, if you get one on your lower extremities, be prepared that you will bleed. I didnt bleed at all with my arm tattoo. But the ankle bled a little bit. It is also pretty sore today.

Do I regret it? Hell No! I have recieved a lot of compliments. Remember, it is permanent. Make sure it is what you want. Take your time and look around for things that catch your eye that you might want on your body. It doesnt have to be on the flash you see in the studio. I got my ideas from a Tshirt and a CD cover! Make sure that it is something that you think you will still be interested in 20 years from now.

I had fun. It sounds crazy. But the tattoo artist was a hell of a nice guy. I will recommend him over and over. I tipped him $20. I was that satisfied. OK, enough typing, I have to apply a thin coat of A & D Ointment to the tattoos.........ow!

Taz


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Section V -- Training Hints and tips
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Section V -- Training Hints and tips - 02-10-2012, 11:23 PM

Section V -- Training Hints and tips
Part 1

How To Use the EZ curl bar for Terrific Lower Bicep

Development




You know the EZ curl bar... it's the one with all those funny curves in it. But what you may not know is how to use the "other" curves for better progress. It's kind of like folding your hands you always do it the same way. Each time you pick up the EZ curl bar you always grab the bar where it feels the most comfortable. The problem is when you're doing curls the comfortable spot on the bar is the worst for building biceps. Here's a better way to do it. Reach over and grap the bar on the curves that forces the little finger higher than the thumb. This will force both of the elbows to your stomach. Rest them on your hip bones. You'll find it hard to even stand up straight. But this

position forces the lower bicep to do all the work. Yeah it's kind of hard on the wrists becauses it places so much stress on the twisting of the hand. But it's this position of the palm that works the lower bicep so well. You can't use much weight doing curls this way but It builds the lower biceps much better than using a heavy weight with the standard grip. Give it a try. You'll see what I mean.

-Taken from Larry Scott.

Part 2

How To Build Incredible Upper Pecs




Upper Pecs are tough to build because it's hard to keep the frontal deltoid from doing all the work whenever you place your body in the right position for building upper pecs. That's because the frontal deltoids are such big bullies. They want to work on almost everything. Here's a little trick I learned that really hits the upper pecs. Just a few sets and you'll have your upper pecs so swollen with blood you won't believe it. Here's what you do. First thing you'll need is a good Smith Machine. It helps if the machine has a bar at least 2 inche diameter but... these are hard to come by so let's assume you have a standard Smith Machine with the normal 1 inch diameter bar.

What I'm about to tell you is the important part anyway.

Lay down on the bench and raise the feet up off the floor so your back is flat on the bench and you can't press with the legs at all. Next, grab the bar with a grip just a little wider than shoulder width. Your goal is to bring the bar right down to the adams apple still keeping the elbows up around the shoulders. This is the key to placing all the stress on the upper pecs. In order to do this you'll need to turn the palms so the bar is running diagonally across the palms. Okay, got that part so far?

Now let the bar down slowly, keeping the elbows high. Then as you start to come up.... don't press the arms out straight... pull the arms straight. Yeah pull...I know this is a strange concept but... The pulling motion makes the pecs do all the work. That's why you can build such great upper pecs on this movement. You've got to keep the elbows up around the shoulders throughout the exercise. This is the key to working the upper pecs. Do 6 or eight reps. The elbows will want to creep back toward the chest. Don't let em. If you have to... drop weight. The key is the form not the weight. Once you've completed 6-8 reps, drop the bar all the way down to the neck. Keeping the elbows way up high, do several bunces right on the bottom. It will give you an incredible burn and pump right where you want it.

-Taken from Larry Scott


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Section VI -- Black List: Mail-Order Scams, Companies, and Scumbags!
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Section VI -- Black List: Mail-Order Scams, Companies, and Scumbags! - 02-10-2012, 11:23 PM

Part 1

Please pay close attention to this section. If we work together we can make rip off artists and scammers a thing of the past. If a potential source wants to advertise his wares on our board,

he/she will be required to give up their home address, phone number and other pertinent info about themselves. The information that they submit will be verified. This may be a harsh method, and it will drive some source away, but the ones with nothing up their sleeves except to do an honest business will be glad to help us with that info. If these sources turn sour on us, then I will advertise the pertinent info on their whereabouts. I have 2 sources that will be posting on our board that will help us get gear from time to time. They do not want to be advertised and they wish to do their business in a low key manner. They will offer to help any honest buyer out by giving them the oppurtunity to do business. In order to get in contact with them, you will have to be referred by one of their customers that have a good repoire. So watch each others back. The person that you are gracious enough to help out by answering his/her questions, or giving some free advice maybe the one to turn you on to these reliable sources. So on the UNDERGROUND SUPPLEMENTS board, it might pay off nicely to be nice and watch your fellow bodybuilders back!


So on to the blacklisted sources.

0 Drugstore O.L. Skouvara & Co., Epaminonda 82, Thiva32200, Greece -- all outgoing mail/packages are flagged by U.S. Customs.

1 Euro Care Mail order Pharmacy, The Netherlands -- Shutdown due to MM2000 article.

2 B.Mougios & Co. Pittakou 23, T.K., 54645, Thessalonike, Greece -- Shutdown

3 Paul Parker / Carlos P.O. Box 83130, San Diego, CA, 92138 -- Busted/DEA gathering information.

4 IC (formerly SHAL) P.O Box 465, North Jackson, OH 44451 -- Scammer/Sells fakes

5 "[email protected]" Coosa, GA Customers reporting that they never received goods.

6 "[email protected]" Toledo, OH Customers reporting that they never received goods.

7 "[email protected]" Customers reporting that they never received goods.

8 "[email protected]" Toledo, OH (could be Stone) Bad reports from customers.

9 Rejuvenation IMP Customers reporting that they never received goods.

10 MDT Customers report that source sells counterfeit and fakes

11 Pharm-Europa Customers report that source sells counterfeits and fakes

12 R. M. Products Customers report that source sells counterfeits and fakes

13 Farmlette Customers report that source sells counterfeits and fakes

14 Winfield Assoc. Customers report that source sells counterfeits and fakes

15 Farma-Mex (Pharma-Mex) Customers report that source sells counterfeits and fakes.

16 Swess Pharma Customers report that source sells counterfeits and fakes

17 NM This source is a scumbag. Counterfeits/fakes/scammer

18 Spider Labs This source is a scammer


Now a list of the more recent scumbags. The above do not post too much and will be easy to spot. To the newest members of our web site, take a good look at the following scumbags. They advertise on the ANABOLIX and ELITE FITNESS boards. They will not be allowed to advertise on our board.

0 Rob O - Robert Orlando - "[email protected]" SCAM ARTIST/RIP OFF/SCUMBAG!

1 Bullforce - "[email protected]" SCAM ARTIST/RIP OFF

2 Steroid or F.M.- "[email protected]" Resides in Spain. Extremely slow delivery or no delivery! I recently asked for a price list and the guy sent me one. So he still is in business. Now maybe using the email address of: [email protected]

3 Babou - "[email protected]" Out of business--Do not send money!

4 D.Young - Dewitt Young - [email protected] Mail troubles to U.S. - Extremely forgetful. However, customers that reside outside the U.S report no problems.

5 Mr. Musclehead This is the quickest scam Ive seen done. This is the source that made trouble for "Hulkster". That trouble is exactly why there will be no advertising of sources on this newsletter. You may hear rumors that "Mr. Musclehead" is actually the "Hulkster". These rumors are not true. The "Hulkster" gave his endorsement to "Mr. Musclehead" and advertised his services. Well, alot of people hold the Hulkster in high regard and trusted this source that the Hulkster trusted. Thus, a lot of people sent in their money. Needless to say, they never received their goods. This was a huge scam because of the big sum of money that was hustled.

6 Comptroller - This is the famed "scanner source". This source will send a scanned image of the products he will send you, when he receives your money. However, some customers are claiming rip-off. They are not receiving their paid-for goods. Comptroller isnt answering the allegations.

7 Offline - This is the latest of the scumbags. He is a Canadian source and if you have been contacted by him, tell him to get lost. If you did get ripped off by this source, then please contact me and I will give you his vital on how you can reach and harrass him.


GRAY LIST

This is the "Grey List" . This is a list of sources that are having problems. They are not fully blacklisted. So use at your own discretion. These sources have come through for some of their customers.

0 Mexiboy - Customers are now complaining that they have not received goods from him. The word is that a source close to Mexiboy is claiming that a hacker is threatening Mexiboy. This has not been confirmed.


CUSTOMS ARE FLAGGING!!

This list is for sources that are legit but may be having problems with U.S. Customs flagging shipments from them.

Unfortuneately I have to put up two sources. These sources are legit and are doing their business honorably. But due to Customs interference, they are now in this category. The first source is :

0 Powersupplements or Pharmagroup They are extremely legit and an honest pharmacuetical company. I have had the fortune in talking to the president of this company and I like him alot. I will work with him to see if we can get his shipping methods changed so he can get his quality products out to the members of the Underground.




Part 2

Eye on FDA

Subject: IMPORT ALERT IA6657

(http://www.fda.gov/ora/fiars/ora_import_ia6657.html)



My friends, I thought you all might find this interesting!!!.....ICEMAN

TYPE OF ALERT: AUTOMATIC DETENTION

PRODUCT: FOREIGN MANUFACTURED UNAPPROVED PRESCRIPTION DRUGS

PRODUCT CODE: 66

HARMONIZED CODE : N/A

PROBLEM: New drug without an approved New Drug Application (NDA) (DRND)

COUNTRY : ALL







CHARGE: "The article is subject to refusal of admission pursuant to Section 801(a)(3) in that it appears to be a new drug within the meaning of Section 201(p) without an approved new drug application [Unapproved New Drug, Section 505(a)]."

RECOMMENDING OFFICE: HFC-131

REASON FOR ALERT: FDA has observed an increase in the promotion and importation of unapproved prescription drugs of foreign origin. Unapproved prescription drugs present serious

safety and effectiveness concerns. Moreover, approved U.S. versions of these drugs are available. Therefore, this import alert is being established to provide a listing of known

distributors.

INSTRUCTIONS: Automatically detain all dosage forms and shipments, commercial and personal, of foreign manufactured unapproved prescription drugs from distributors listed in the attachment. Districts should determine whether the drugs are covered by a current approved NDA or IND.

FDA has concluded that shipments of these foreign manufactured unapproved prescription drugs are inappropriate for release under the personal importation policy.

FOI: No purging is required

DISTRIBUTORS OF FOREIGN MANUFACTURED UNAPPROVED PRESCRIPTION DRUGS PROMOTED TO INDIVIDUALS IN THE U.S.

PRODUCT SOURCE COUNTRY



ALL PRESCRIPTION INTERPHARM, INC. NASSAU, BAHAMAS

DRUGS INTERNATIONAL

PHARMACY

ALL PRESCRIPTION NORTHAM Medication NASSAU, BAHAMAS

DRUGS Service International

Pharmacy

ALL PRESCRIPTION INHOME HEALTH DELEMONT, SWITZERLAND

DRUGS SERVICES

** Denotes firms that ship for Inhome Health Services



**ALL PRESCRIPTION M. BOURQUIN BELGIUM

DRUGS P.O. BOX 108

ANTWERP, BELGIUM

**ALL PRESCRIPTION ZITA TROS BELGIUM

DRUGS P.O. BOX 108

ANTWERP, BELGIUM

**ALL PRESCRIPTION N. CLAN OR E. CLAES BELGIUM

DRUGS P.O. BOX 108

ANTWERP, BELGIUM

**ALL PRESCRIPTION MARGARET EDEN BELGIUM

DRUGS AMERICALEI 159

B.82 B-2000

ANTWERP, BELGIUM

**ALL PRESCRIPTION F.J.M. BORKING NETHERLANDS

DRUGS VINKEVEEN,

DOOAARSLAN 90 NETHERLANDS





**ALL PRESCRIPTION UNKNOWN AMSTERDAM

DRUGS P.O. BOX 70385

NETHERLANDS

**ALL PRESCRIPTION S. KESSLER BELGIUM

DRUGS AMERICALEI 159

B.82 B-2000

ANTWERP, BELGIUM

PERGONAL AND BIOMEDICAL HOLDING ARUBA AND CURACAO

METRODIN A.V.V. NETHERLANDS

ANTILLES


ALL PRESCRIPTION QUOTZA S. A. ITALY

DRUGS VIA CERVI #6

46020 PALIDANO

ITALY

MID# ITQUOSA6PAL

MANNHEIM, WEST GERMANY)

PERGONAL AND BIOMED HOLDING A.V.V. CURACAO,

METRODIN GROOT KWARTIER NETHERLAND,

BOX 4469, ANTILLES

MID#NBIOHOL4469CUR

PERGONAL AND CURACAO SERVICES N.V. CURACAO,

METRODIN NETHERLAND ANTILLES

ALL PRESCRIPTION International Products HANOVER, GERMANY

DRUGS

ALL PRESCRIPTION Quotaz S.A. WEST GERMANY

DRUGS P7, 20-21 (Planken)

D-6800 Mannheim 1

West Germany

ID#DEQUOSA2021MAN


**ALL PRESCRIPTION AZTECA TRIO ZONA RIO TIJUANA,

DRUGS INTERNACIONAL MEXICO

S.A. de C.V.

**ALL PRESCRIPTION BAJA TRIADO ZONA RIO, TIJUANA, B.C.

DRUGS INTERNACIONAL, S.A.

DE C.V. MEXICO

Note: The above shipper appears to be a new name for the firmidentified in this import alert as Azteca Trio Internacional S.A. de C.V., Zona Rio Tijuana, Mexico.

Beta-Interferon SERONC Canada Inc. Canada

(Alternate Names = 5915 Airport Road Suite 810

Rebif (TM) Mississaugua, Ontario, L4V 1T1

R-FRONE (R) Canada

MID#XOSERCAN5915MIS


Beta-Interferon CORNE,S.A. de C.V. Mexico

(Trade name Rio San Lorenzo No. 623

FRONE TM) Col. Puentes del Valle

Garza Garcia, Nuevo Leon

66220, Mexico




Manufacturer: Serono Laboratories Mexico


SAN-DO received promotional literature for the purchase of the above referenced product. The literature identifies the product for the treatment of Multiple Sclerosis and implies it is similar

to the approved Interferon beta-1b approved for use in the U.S. The product is shipped via UPS upon receipt of a doctor's prescription. The shipment includes FRONE TM 3,000,000 U.I. with

dilutent, etc. for $200. Information from the manufacturer of the approved Beta-Interferon to be sold in the U.S., indicates this product appears to be half the strength of the U.S. recommended therapeutic dose.



ALL PRESCRIPTION INTERLAB LONDON, ENGLAND

DRUGS BCM BOX 5890

LONDON WC1N 3XX

ENGLAND

MID #GBINT5890LON



ALL PRESCRIPTION MEDICINE CLUB OF NASSAU, BAHAMAS

DRUGS AMERICA, INC.

INTERNATIONAL PHARMACY


ALL PRESCRIPTION MEDICINE CLUB NASSAU, BAHAMAS

DRUGS INTERNATIONAL, INC.


ALL PRESCRIPTION INTERNATIONAL UNITED KING***

DRUGS ANTIAGING SYSTEMS

(IAS)

PO BOX 2995

MUSWELL HILL, LONDON N10 2NA

ID# GBINTANT2995MUS


PERGONAL AND EFES CORPORATION BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS

METRODIN ABBOTT BUILDING 2ND FLR

P.O. BOX 933

ROAD TOWN, TORTOLA

BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS

MID #VGEFECOR933ROA

ALL PRESCRIPTION A. WERNER & CO. CZECHOSLOVAKIA

DRUGS P.O. BOX 615

111 21 PRAGUE 1

CZECHOSLOVAKIA

MID #: CSWERCO615PRA

ALL PRESCRIPTION *B. MOUGIOS AND CO. GREECE

DRUGS PITTAKOU 23 T.K. 54645

THESSALONIKI - GREECE

MID#GRMOUAND23THE

*The above firm is presently on automatic detention. However, we have been amde aware of other names being used. Any variations to this firm name, including, but not limited to, Georgios,

Georgiadou, B&G Moyres, etc., and also using other cities in Greece should be viewed as the same operation and will be subject to this import alert.





STERILE OPHTHALMIC SHAH & SHAH INTRAOCULAR INDIA

HYDROXYPROPYL LENS (PVT.) LTD.

METHYLCELLULOSE 2%2 RUSSELL STREET

SOLUTION USP FOR H.D. ROAD, JOKA 743512 INTRAOCULAR USE CALCUTTA 700 071, INDIA

PRODUCT CODE: 55R--14

MID: INSHASHA743CAL

FEI:1000327725

ALL PRESCRIPTION THE ALZHEIMER'S BUYERS' SWITZERLAND

DRUGS CLUB

POST FACH CH-8911 O.

RIFFERSWIL, SWITZERLAND

MID #CHALZBUYRIF

ALL PRESCRIPTION AMIMED DIRECT LTD. UNITED KING***

DRUGS PO 6983

LONDON, ENGLAND E17 5TR

MID #GBAMIDIR6983LON

ALL PRESCRIPTION MERCANTIL FARMACEUTICA MEXICO

DRUGS PATRIA

NEWTON 104 COL. POLANCO

MEXICO 5 D.F.C.P.,

MEXICO, 11560

MID#MXMERFAR104MEX

ALL PRESCRIPTION Olympia Skouvara Greece

DRUGS 36 Agorakritou Street

Athens, 10440, Greece

FEI# 1000369562

AND

Vipharm Pharmaceutical Products

(OL Skouvara & Co.

82 Epamidoda Street

Thiva, 32200, Greece

FEI# 3000721937

ALL PRESCRIPTION Innomed-Mex aka Innovaciones MEXICO

DRUGS Medicas S.A. De C.V.

Product Code-GPI-DR

Protasio Tagle no. 132 A y B

colonia San Miguel

Chapultepec 11900 Mexico, D.F.

MID# MXINNMED132CHA

FEI# 1000409967

ALL PRESCRIPTION Euro Care Mailorder Pharmacy NETHERLANDS

DRUGS P.O Box 75 8200 AB

Lelystad, the Netherlands

Product Code-GPI-DR

MID:NLEURCAR8200LEL

FEI:1000496455

ALL PRESCRIPTION P. Goudvis NETHERLANDS

DRUGS Vyzelweg 32 8243 PM

Lelystad, The Netherlands

Product Code-GPI-DR

MID:NLGOU8243LEL

FEI:1000535082

ALL PRESCRIPTION Pharmacie Chatel FRANCE

DRUGS 38 Avenue de Clichy

Paris, France

MID# FRPHACHA38PAR

FEI# 1000549885

ALL PRESCRIPTION CS Distributors S.A. MEXICO

DRUGS de C.V. (main office)

Cordoba # 138 Col. Roma

Mexico City, Mexico

MID# MXCSDIS138MEX

FEI# 1000549924

ALL PRESCRIPTION CS Distributors S.A. MEXICO

DRUGS de C.V. (manufacturing plant)

Av. de la Carretera No. 1335

Cd. Industrial Irapuato

Irapuato, Mexico

MID# MXCSDIS1335IRA

FEI# 1000549925

ALL PRESCRIPTION Alan Pharmaceuticals UNITED KING***

DRUGS 204 Essex Road

London, England N1-3AP

MID# GBALAPHA204LON

FEI# 1000549879

ALL PRESCRIPTION Afz. Fisher NETHERLANDS

DRUGS Vyzelweg 32 8243 PM

Lelystad, The Netherlands

MID:NLGOU8243LEL

MID:NLAFZFIS8243LEL

FEI:1000535082

Note: This name has been identified as an alternate name used on packages shipped by P. Goudvis at the same address.

ALL PRESCRIPTION ALP Food Supplements NETHERLANDS

DRUGS aka J.H. Agelink

De Wittenkade 122-1

Amsterdam, 1051 AL

The Netherlands

MID:NLALPFOO1221AMS

MID:NLJHAGE1221AMS

FEI:1000562753

Reason for revision: Promotional solicitations for purchasing foreign versions of approved U.S. prescription drugs. Note: These firms have been identified as shippers for orders made through

Euro Care Mailorder Pharmacy, which is also on detention without physical examination of import alert 66-57. ALP Food Supplements (aka J.H. Agelink) has also been identified as soliciting

individuals through the World Wide Webb (Internet).

Section VII-- Counterfeits/Fake Steroids


Part 1

Fakes (Useless)

- Russian Dianabol Blister packs have poor quality print (in Russian) and it has "Methanadrolone" and "000.5r" printed on it. The colors used

for this print is black and blue. The directions that come with

the tablets, is printed on a green like colored paper.

- Deca Durabolin From Organon Co. (Greece) Lot#931104-012 Exp. 991128

100mg/ml, 2ml/vial, 3 vials per box

- Deca Durabolin From Organon Co. Lot#292698A 200mg/ml, 2ml vial. The vial

is brownish in color with a blue cap.

- Sustanon Russian Sustanon "CYCTAHOH 250" The 1cc amp is clear with

a bright scoring mark around the neck. The label on the amp has

rounded corners. Lot#252179, Manufacture Date: Mai '95

Exp. Date: Mai 99.

- Pronabol-5 India, the fakes come in a plain foil strip on 10 tabs. The real version

comes in a vacuum packed foil strip with purple writing on it. The tabs

are marked "P-5"







Part 2

Counterfeits (good stuff)


These are the latest counterfeits floating around. They contain real steroids but sometimes they may be underdosed, or another type of steroid is used instead of the advertised one.

- Parabolan Negma (France) Parabolan Exp. 08/96

- Test. Ethanate Steris Labs (USA) 200mg/ml 10cc vial

- Test. Cypionate Steris Labs (USA) 200mg/ml 10cc vial

- Test. Propionate Steris Labs (USA) 100mg/ml 10cc vial

- Test. Suspension Steris Labs (USA) 100mg/ml 30cc vial

- HCG Steris Labs (USA)

- Primobolan (Spanish) 100mg/ml contains 50mg Nandrolone Phenlypropionate. The blue spot is smaller, the

score mark is very visual, different plastic tray.

(The above information was obtained from the Hulksters newsletter)





UPCOMING IN THE NEXT ISSUE


Im excited to tell you that the Vae Victus will be adding more features in the upcoming issues. I have recruited a source from Europe who has graciously volunteered to do some descriptions of legit anabolics that are coming out of the European market. He will give a detailed descriptions on the different brands of European gear so that you the buyer can tell if you have a fake or not. This information will be handy for you to get a description of the product before you even buy it. Every month we will feature a couple of different popular anabolics which will have detailed descriptions, where they are from, and pricing.

Also I have recruited a writer who will feature articles on ways that we can use to protect ourselves from the oppressive government that infringe upon our rights to change our bodies any way we seem fit. The articles will feature the methods and practices that the government uses to try and stop us from using our rights. It will also teach us how to counter these measures and protect ourselves. I assure you that the writer is very well teached on how Big Brother operates. Im sure you will find the articles most interesting and informative. Look for both of these new sections in the next issue of Vae Victus.


Tren is God, I am he
   
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